See You Around
by Andie O'Neill
Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it’s Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR “I Do, Over.”
1. Chapter 1

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: I'm sure a lot of people are upset with the sudden end of Stark, but I have a feeling the writers have something up their sleeve and that Nathan will return. This is just one possibility of how it happens.

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part One

"_I'll see you around, Jack."_

Jack couldn't help but stare as the countdown continued. He didn't understand. He knew something bad was about to happen. Stark knew it too if the sad look in his eyes meant anything at all. He couldn't look away no matter how hard he wanted to. He could only stare into Nathan's eyes, see the tears Stark refused to let fall and suddenly it hit him like a ton of bricks. His heart wouldn't stop pounding… it raged like a wild animal forced to be caged. He felt cold, as if the world was both ending and beginning at the same time and he was powerless to stop it. And suddenly it was over, and his body went numb. He watched as Doctor Nathan Stark disappeared, taking a piece of Jack's soul with him.

* * *

**_Two Months Later_**

He couldn't sleep. He never could. The nightmares were the worst, and although it helped to have his sister and his daughter to lean on for support, he could never really make them understand. Jack Carter hated Nathan Stark… so why did it hurt so much? It was late, that much he knew. The lights were off in his room as he lay in bed, rolling the beautiful diamond Nathan had gotten for Allison. He'd never given it to her; despite Stark's wishes… he hadn't been able to let it go. Maybe it was selfish. After all, Nathan had loved Allison. They were going to get married… but as he'd told Allison what had happened he realized as his hand reached into his pocket for the necklace that he couldn't give up the object that connected him the most to Nathan. And so, each night he would take it from his drawer, pulling the diamond off its chain and just stare… not quite sure why it meant so much to him.

When he closed his eyes he could still see Nathan's smile just before he faded away. It haunted him. How could a man he'd spent years despising affect him this way? _'Because you never hated him, Jack. You never hated him.'_ Jack tightened his grip on the diamond, a silent tear falling down his face as it sometimes did in the night. He never cried… not until now. But he couldn't stop thinking about Nathan's last words… the look in his eyes. He'd known something, and Jack couldn't understand why as everyone else mourned Nathan Stark's death, he didn't.

"_I'll see you around, Jack."_

Jack closed his eyes tight, trying to stop the words from repeating in his mind despite how hopeless it was. Those words were like a rope, and Jack couldn't untie its knots. He couldn't mourn Nathan's death because… somehow… he believed them. He hoped in them. When he felt the sob rip out of him there were no defenses. Tears flowed from his eyes, his hand holding the diamond that much harder.

"Dad?!"

He could hear his daughter's voice, but he couldn't get control. The tears were rolling down his face, as if the flood gates had finally been opened and there was no stopping them. Zoe pulled him into her arms, rocking him gently as he cried.

"Dad… it's okay. I'm so sorry. I didn't know, Dad. I… didn't know," she whispered to him, kissing the top of his head as his arms wrapped around her. In the morning he would pretend that everything was okay, but as for that night… he would cry for the man who'd never said goodbye.

* * *

He couldn't feel, see, touch, nor taste… yet somehow he could. He couldn't even speak, though there was nothing he could say even if he could. He was everything, and he was nothing, and as he felt the energy surround him, move through him he realized what was happening was beyond understanding. He saw the future. He saw the past. He saw time. Everything was at his finger tips, yet not.

"_The question is… will you be ready?"_

He could hear the words so clear in his mind, a question he finally knew the answer to.

* * *

Jack sat at his kitchen table, quietly drinking his coffee while his daughter tried not to stare. It'd been a rough night, but somehow he'd never felt better. It was like shedding dead skin… he couldn't be someone new unless he peeled off the past. His heart ached in a way he'd never expected, but somehow he knew he was finally ready to admit the truth… because he'd never hated Nathan Stark.

"Good morning," a voice said from behind him as his younger sister walked into the room, giving him and Zoe a kiss on the cheek.

"Morning," said Zoe, her voice so filled with sadness, that Jack almost winced.

Jack looked over at his sister, seeing the worry in her eyes and smiled. "Morning stretch," he whispered before getting up from the table, grabbing his things and walking toward the door.

* * *

The first moments of consciousness were the hardest to understand. One minute there was nothingness… the next there was. All his senses were activated at once at he felt as if his mind would overload from the shock. He could move, breathe, see, smell, taste, and talk… all at once. The scream of agony that ripped through his lungs was loud, and his ears rang. He could feel the blood running through his veins. He could feel his heart beating faster and faster. He couldn't comprehend as he felt the grass brush against his skin. It was too much. It was all too much, and he didn't know how to make it stop.

* * *

Carter knew he was supposed to be at work an hour ago. Jo hadn't tried to call him though… she never did… not since Nathan disappeared. It was as if they all knew what he'd only just accepted, which seemed so impossible considering the fact that most in Eureka had expected him to be in love with Allison. Jack had thought so too. After telling her what happened he still remembered holding her in his arms as she cried, telling her it would be okay and that he was there for her… he always would be. He loved her with every bone in his body… but he ached with his very soul for Nathan. It didn't make any sense, but then again… life in Eureka never did.

He was forced from his thoughts with a resounding scream, and his feet had immediately hit the breaks. He hadn't even realized where he'd driven to. It was the middle of nowhere on some back road of Eureka and he knew he'd been there before… but he couldn't think of when. Suddenly the feeling was back, a numbness he hadn't felt since watching Nathan slip away and he could feel his hands shaking as he opened the car door to search for the originator of the deafening scream. The words left him before he could hold them back. "Nathan?!"

Jack ran… ran like he never had before and he couldn't make his legs stop even if he wanted them to. And suddenly he was in a clearing as he could see the very person that had haunted his dreams for the past two months. "Nathan!" he shouted again, running even faster toward the body lying in the grass, thrashing on the ground as if he were possessed. It took him a few minutes to realize Nathan Stark was actually there, completely naked. "Oh my god! This isn't possible!" he whispered in shock as he pulled the man into his arms without thinking.

Nathan gripped him fiercely, his eyes wide in shock, as he gasped for breath. "W... wh… who-" he tried to speak.

"Nathan?"

"Who… a… am… I?" he finally forced out,

Carter froze in surprise, holding him even tighter. "It's okay Nathan… I'm here. It's going to be okay."

Nathan said nothing more. He simply stared up at Jack as if nothing else existed, his familiar green eyes, so intense Carter couldn't look away. It wasn't possible… couldn't be, but he was there… in the flesh… alive. Nathan Stark was alive, and Jack couldn't let him go.

* * *

It had taken all the energy Jack had left to call for Jo and tell her what had happened. He hadn't left Nathan's side, and it didn't seem like he would be allowed to even if he wanted to. Stark hadn't let him go since the moment he'd found him. The others had wanted to move him, take him back to GD and figure things out, but Nathan wouldn't go. He was scared out of his mind, and wasn't letting anyone near him but Jack. Carter wrapped the blanket Henry had brought for Nathan hours ago just a bit tighter around the large man, covering up his nakedness as others did their scans of the area, trying to solve the mystery no one could comprehend.

Allison Blake stood at a distance, simply staring at them both with such an intense gaze it almost rivaled the one Nathan was giving him. Carter looked up to meet her stare and smiled weakly, nodding just a bit as he silently asked her to come. Allison hesitated for a second before walking slowly toward them both, still a little upset. When she'd first arrived Nathan had been absolutely terrified, and had moved away from her touch, burrowing into Jack that much more. "How is he?" Allison asked, staring at Nathan.

Nathan's eyes were closed, but Jack knew he wasn't sleeping. "He's calmed down, so that's always good."

"Has he said anything? Anything at all?"

Jack shook his head. "The only thing he did was ask who he was. I've tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't say anything more. I think he's still a little out of it."

"He doesn't remember a thing?" she asked.

Carter shrugged. "I really don't know. He obviously knows how to talk, so the memories are there…. He can move, though I'm not sure if he can walk. It's like he's an infant."

Allison nodded, smiling sadly. "I never thought I'd see the day…" she whispered.

Jack looked up at her curiously. "What?"

"The day that Nathan Stark would be clinging to you like you were as precious as gold," she told him.

Carter chuckled, rubbing his back as he continued to soothe the man he wasn't supposed to care about. "I never thought I'd see the day when I'd be clinging back," he muttered sadly. "He's alive, Ally," he whispered.

"Yeah." It was all she could seem to say as the tears began to fall and she moved to sit down beside him. She didn't move to touch him. She just sat there with them both, watching over Nathan just as Jack was. He supposed it made sense. In they'd both cared about Stark, even if Carter had only realized it after he'd been gone. "The question is… how." Carter shook his head as Nathan's last words rung through his mind for the hundredth time.

"_I'll see you around, Jack."_

"I don't know, but somehow… I think Nathan knew all along. Don't ask me how… but I think he knew. He knew it wasn't the end." Jack looked up at Allison, not quite sure how to explain Stark's last words and the look in his eyes. "I was the last one to see him…. He was looking right at me and… he was smiling. There were tears in his eyes, but he was smiling. He looked right at me, and I looked back at him and… I don't know. I watched him disappear… he was there, and then he was just… gone." He knew he probably wasn't making much sense, but he didn't think he could do any better. Nothing else mattered but the man he was hold in his arms.

"I'll see you around, Jack," Stark whispered, and Carter froze immediately.

"Nathan?" questioned Allison, hope in her eyes.

"See you… around," Stark spoke, his eyes opening slowly. "Jack."

Allison looked over at Carter, confused by Stark's words.

"It's the last thing he said to me before he disappeared. Could he be remembering… something?" Jack asked her, looking down at Nathan, their eyes locked.

"I don't know… possibly," was Allison's answer. "Nathan? Do you know who I am?" she asked.

Nathan shook his head, moving closer to Carter.

"Do you know who he is?" she then asked, pointing to the Sheriff.

"J… Ja… Jack," Nathan stumbled on the words, looking extremely confused.

Carter smiled, looking up at Allison, before his gaze went back to Nathan. "That's right… that's right Stark, I'm Jack."

"Who am I?" Nathan asked. Carter couldn't help but wonder how he could remember Jack's name, but not his own.

"Your name is Nathan Stark," Jack answered quietly.

"Nathan Stark," he repeated, as if trying to understand the words.

"That's right Nathan, that's your name," added Allison, her voice filled with affection.

"N… name," Stark spoke. "Who am I?"

Jack frowned, realizing the man before him didn't understand. "Your Nathan… and your home."

"Home," Stark repeated his voice a little more even. "Jack… Nathan's home?"

Carter laughed, unable to process it all. It was just too much. "That's right, Nathan… your home. You're finally home."

Nathan continued to stare at him, as if trying to comprehend, a look he was sure Stark had seen on Jack more than once while trying to understand some crazy calculation or technical term. He knew it wouldn't be easy. Stark was starting from scratch, but he wouldn't be alone. Carter promised himself silently to do everything in his power to help Nathan be the man he'd once been… the man Jack Carter didn't hate. The man Jack Carter loved.

To Be Continued


	2. Chapter 2

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: Sorry it took so long for me to update this! I promise not to take so long with the next chapter! Just got caught up with my other fic is all! Anyway, hope you enjoy! Loved all of your reviews!

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Two

_**Two Weeks Later**_

"Hey Carter, you okay?" Allison asked him as she walked out of Global Dynamics along his side. She looked worried, though he really couldn't blame her. It'd been a very long day, and not much had gone right. He was tired, dirty, and just plain frustrated. They walked toward his car together, and Carter forced himself to relax. For two months after Nathan disappeared Jack and Allison had learned to rely on each other in a way they never had before. Not only had they become closer friends, but they'd learned to trust each other.

"Yeah, I'm fine… just a little worn out. Think I'm just gonna head home, grab a beer, and pass out on the couch," he told her with a weak smile. "You still coming over with Kevin tomorrow?"

They stopped in front of Jack's car, him leaning against it more out of exhaustion than anything else. Allison smiled. "I know Kevin would love to see Nathan, but I think we're just going to give you both a break tomorrow. We'll try for next week."

"Allison, I'm fine. When we made the decision to have Nathan stay with me and Zoe, it was under the condition that his family would come to visit him. He's never going to be comfortable around you guys unless you spend time with him," he reminded her gently. After they'd finally calmed Nathan enough to be moved they'd realized quite early that Stark wouldn't respond with anyone unless Carter was with him. Jack had agreed to let Nathan stay with him at the bunker while they all did their best to help him rediscover the Nathan Stark they'd all known before his heroic sacrifice. The Doctors had made it clear that it was possible he would never retain his memories, but that they should all be patient and wait and see. Stark seemed to remember some things by instinct, like how to use a computer. To Jack, Nathan seemed just as brilliant (or maybe even more brilliant) as before… he could remember the complex equations and theories, but couldn't remember what his mother looked like or where he'd been raised.

"I promise we'll be by next week," Allison assured him with a warm, yet somehow sad smile. Jack knew how hard it was for her. Stark didn't even remember her. She'd done her best to be understanding, but Carter knew it was killing her. They'd been married once… were going to do it again. They'd been in love once, but things were different now. Stark wasn't quite as comfortable around her anymore, not like how he was with him. Ironically, the only person Nathan seemed to remember the most was Jack, the last moments before he disappeared being the clearest memory he had.

Carter sighed, kissing her forehead gently before pulling her into a warm hug. "Give Kevin a hug for me, okay?"

Allison simply nodded, hugging him back before finally pulling away. "Only if you give Nathan and Zoe a hug for me," she told him.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Me? Hug Stark? Isn't it enough that the guy's living in my house?" he spoke, falling back to old jokes.

Allison laughed, and suddenly Carter felt better. He hated seeing her upset. "Go home, Carter."

Jack nodded, and opened his car door, forcing himself to climb inside. Allison waved as he pulled off, and he immediately smiled, waving back in return before he pulled out of the GD parking lot.

* * *

The moment he came home he could hear the familiar sound of laughing coming from the living room, and smiled as he saw Zoe and Stark sitting on the couch together looking at her laptop. "Maybe we should give him a better nose," Zoe said between giggles.

Nathan grinned. "And he should have blue eyes instead of green… like Carter!"

Zoe rolled her eyes and typed something on the computer. Curious, Jack walked over to them. "Hey guys… what ya doing?"

Zoe smiled. "We're making the perfect guy," she explained and turned the laptop for him to see. Jack frowned when he saw nothing but a single DNA strand. "It's for my school project," she elaborated and returned to her typing.

"His nose was too big," Nathan added, chuckling.

Jack shook his head, smiling at the two. They'd become fast friends since Carter had agreed to let Nathan stay with them, as they seemed to spend the most amount of time together. It was still strange to see Nathan Stark so open and honest, almost like a child rather than being his usual cynical self. Although Carter would never admit it out loud, he sometimes missed the sarcastic Stark… sometimes. "S.A.R.A.H. beer me!" he called out and walked over to the fridge, grabbing his drink before he joined his daughter and Nathan on the couch. "Ah… baseball time," he told them with a pleasant grin and watched Stark and Zoe groan. At least some things stayed the same….

* * *

It was late in the night when he heard the faint cries of Nathan Stark in the room next to his and Jack was immediately out of bed and by his side, rocking him softly as Stark clung to him in fear. He'd been having nightmares almost every night, though Jack wasn't sure what they were about. He tried asking a few times only to watch Stark panic immediately. Jack knew it would simply take time for him to feel comfortable enough to talk about whatever was bothering him. "It's okay… I got ya," he soothed, trying to ignore the fact that weeks before Zoe had done the same for him.

It took hours for Nathan to finally relax and Carter immediately moved, ready to return to his room. "Stay," whispered Stark, his eyes intense… the kind of intensity Jack remembered seeing just before he disappeared.

Jack frowned. "I gotta get to bed, Nathan… my bed." He didn't like the idea of sleeping with Nathan, even if it was just to sleep. He couldn't help believing that one day he'd remember everything and things would go back to how they'd always been. They'd be back to being enemies, and Nathan would go back to Allison for good. When he tried to pull away Stark wrapped an arm around his waste, and Jack could see the panic in his eyes. "What's wrong, Nathan?"

"You… you almost died," he whispered. "I saw a woman… a blonde woman with Zoe and they were standing around you and I was trying to figure out how to save you, but I didn't know how."

He was remembering, Jack realized, and with a sigh he moved under the covers, not quite sure what to do. They were facing each other, Nathan's arm draped loosely on his waste. "The blonde woman was my ex-wife, Abby. I remember… I was trapped in Beverly's therapy device," he explained with a sad smile. "When I woke up you were gone."

Stark nodded, his eyes never leaving Jack's. "I… was sitting in a room… my head in my hands. I didn't want the others to see."

"See what?" Carter asked him softly.

"That I cared," Nathan admitted. "I didn't want the other's to see how much I cared. You almost died and I cared…."

Jack smiled; resting his forehead against Stark's and closed his eyes. "Go to sleep, Stark," he told him as if he were talking to a child. "I'll be here when you wake up."

"Promise?"

The words startled Jack and he immediately smiled. "Yeah… I promise," he said and watched Nathan finally close his eyes, finally going to sleep. Jack spent an hour just watching him, not quite sure how to handle the connection between them. He briefly wondered if the Nathan before him, so vulnerable and child-like was what lied behind the mask of indifference Stark had spent so many years developing. He certainly hoped it was, though it seemed far-fetched…. He wondered if that Stark was ever coming back, and couldn't help but wish for a mixture of the two… both the child-like Nathan, and the sarcastic Doctor Stark. It was that thought that would haunt Jack's dreams as he finally joined Nathan, drifting off to sleep.

* * *

Lexi smiled, watching her brother sleep, a gentle smile on his face as he held Nathan Stark. It was almost strange to think she might have missed this side of her brother, had she decided not to visit. She'd expected big speeches and lots of yelling when she'd finally tell her brother about the baby and her issues with Duncan. Instead Jack had suffered the lost of someone he'd cared very deeply for, only to have him back months later. For two months Lexi hadn't been sure how to help Jack deal with the loss. She was used to the calm, dependable, stiff man that so reflected their father. Eureka had obviously changed him quite a bit since then. Zoe had tried to assure her of that when she'd called to say she would be coming for a visit, but she'd never imagined just how true her niece's words would be. Jackie truly had changed, and she couldn't be more pleased… or more proud.

"Should we wake him?" Zoe whispered from behind her. Lexi turned to look at her niece and shook her head.

"It's pretty early, let's give him a bit longer… besides, why ruin such a Kodak moment?" she asked, making Zoe laugh. "Come on kiddo, I'm starving!"

* * *

Jack moaned, slowly opening his eyes in the dark room. He tried to move only to realize he was being restrained, and stifled a snort as he looked down to see Nathan's head on his shoulder, his arm wrapped around his waste as if even unconscious he expected him to leave. Even their legs were tangled underneath the sheets. It was a familiar feeling to wake up with someone… he had done it for over a decade when he'd been married to Abby, but he never remembered feeling so well rested. "Stark?"

Nathan sighed in his sleep, snuggling even further into Jack's warmth.

Carter rolled his eyes. "Stark!" he said just a bit louder, shaking him gently.

Finally Nathan sucked in a breath, his eyes fluttering open as he looked up at Jack, immediately moving away. "Oh… sorry," he apologized.

Jack almost laughed as he noticed Stark blush even in the dark room. "It's fine… I think you missed your calling through. You make a great blanket," he teased.

Stark chuckled, grabbing the pillow and immediately whacked him over the head with it. "Shut up Carter," he muttered and got up out of bed, rubbing his face as he walked out of the room.

Jack watched him go, shaking his head as he tried and failed to keep the mirth off his face. With a quiet groan he got out of the bed, following the smell of coffee straight to the kitchen.

* * *

Jack sat quietly in his car as he parked in front of the house that had once been owned by Beverly. The new owner wasn't quite as alluring, but Carter had no doubts that she belonged in Eureka. She was good at her job. Unfortunately, it didn't matter how good she was when it came to Nathan Stark. "It's just an hour. I'll come and pick you up just as soon as it's over. She can help you," Jack told him gently, while making no move to get out of the car.

Stark stared at the house with his usual intensity, but Carter could see his fear. "I don't want to go. Can't I just… stay home today?"

"Nathan, Doctor Quinn is good at her job. She can help you remember... help you deal with what happened. I'm a Sheriff, Stark, not a therapist," Jack tried to explain, understanding how hard it was for Nathan. He was still dealing with quite a few trust issues, and it didn't help that Stark had never even met Doctor Quinn until after he'd come back. He could at least remember flashes of some of the others in Eureka. He knew almost nothing about the town's new therapist. What made matters worse was that in the past Carter had always been right beside him when he'd gone through sessions with Quinn, but now he would be talking to her alone. "I tell you what. If you go in there… I promise to keep my phone on and ready. If you start feeling uncomfortable just give me a call okay?"

Stark sighed, looking away. "Okay Jack," he finally agreed.

Carter smiled, patting his forearm for comfort. "Come on… we're going to be late."

Nathan nodded and got out of the car, following Jack up the steps. Somehow Carter couldn't help but remember Zoe's first day of school, and how scared she'd been when he'd gone to drop her off. Quinn opened the door and greeted them both, inviting Stark in. Stark did as told, with one last look at Carter for support. Jack gave him an encouraging smile and soon both the Doctor and Nathan were gone. He'd just managed to climb into his car when Jack heard his cell phone ring and he couldn't help but laugh as he answered. "For god's sake just talk to her, Stark!" he said with a grin.

His heart softened when he heard Nathan laugh in return.

To Be Continued


	3. Chapter 3

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: This one is a bit more angsty, but then again I did promise angst…. :D

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Three

When Jack walked into Allison Blake's office after dropping off Stark he could immediately feel the hairs on the back of his neck stand at attention, a sure indication that something was wrong. Henry had his back against the wall, his eyes focused on Allison, a deep frown replacing his usual easy-going smile. Allison didn't look any better, and it was scaring the crap out of Carter. "Okay… what's going on?" he asked.

Henry sighed, rubbing his face as if he hadn't slept in weeks. "We need to tell him," Deacon told Allison, completely ignoring Jack's question.

Allison gave a short nod before looking away.

It was Henry that finally spoke. "We wanted to tell you earlier, but when Thorne found out…." Jack watched his best friend hesitate, looking away. "I'm sorry Jack; we shouldn't have kept this from you."

"Kept what from me?" Carter asked, unable to ignore the growing anger he was feeling as he realized where the conversation was heading.

"We've finished the scans of the area where you found Nathan, Carter. Thorne tried to block us, but Henry managed to get some pretty detailed scans. The radiation levels were pretty low, but when Henry realized they were familiar… it didn't take us long to figure out what was happening," explained Allison.

Jack immediately knew what the issue was, and the sinking in his gut only worsened. "The artifact," he almost whispered in understanding.

Henry stared back at him, and Jack could see the regret in his eyes. "That kind of energy doesn't just go away, Jack. It had to go somewhere…."

"You think it went into, Nathan?" Carter questioned in surprise. "How would that even be possible? We saw what that kind of radiation did to him… he almost became a barbeque," Jack fought, not sure he was ready to believe their hypothesis.

"Carter, how else do you explain those scans? He didn't just appear out of nowhere," Allison told him, her voice gentle. After a pause she looked away. "We don't know anything yet, but we need you to keep a close eye on Nathan. Until we find out how he got here… we need to know about anything that might be unusual behavior."

Jack rolled his eyes. "Unusual behavior… right," he muttered, leaving the room without another word.

"That went well." He can hear Allison's words just as he slams the door shut behind him, not quite sure why he's so upset, but too tired to care either way.

* * *

Doctor Elaine Quinn had only been living in Eureka for about a month as a replacement for Beverly Barlow who'd been pronounced dead months before. It'd been rough getting so many to open up to a new therapist, but she'd managed just fine. Doctor Nathan Stark was something completely different. Elaine could tell trust was an issue. She couldn't really blame him. He barely had any memories of anyone in Eureka except for Sheriff Carter who from what she'd heard hadn't been his closest friend before Stark's disappearance. She'd been shocked to hear they were rivals once after seeing them together when Nathan had gone in for his first session while still at the infirmary. He'd been clinging to Carter as if he was the very air he breathed, and the Sheriff hadn't seemed to mind at all.

Jack Carter had been very understanding and patient with Stark through the whole experience, showing a tenderness Elaine had never expected for a would-be rival. It was obvious their relationship was far more complicated than how it had been described by others. Elaine had a feeling they were quite the rivals they'd made people think they were. During a session with Taggart he'd described them as a 'bickering married couple,' after a particularly stressful predicament the three had gotten into at GD before her time. Somehow, those descriptions had seemed far more similar to what she often saw between Stark and Carter. Elaine stared over at Nathan, still deep within the trance she'd put him into. Hypnosis seemed to be the only way to get into Stark's mind without his walls immediately going up.

"I can see her face… remember how it felt when we were together, but it's like watching a movie about someone else's life. It doesn't feel like my own. It feels alien. Even when I was with Allison… it never felt right… just familiar. It felt safe. I loved her, but something was missing... always missing. She made me happy, but I know I'm capable of feeling more... I just don't know how."

Elaine frowned. She couldn't imagine what Allison Blake was going through. The man she had once married, and had planned on marrying again… had been killed only to practically be resurrected again, but with almost little to no memory of the relationship. Still, one person at a time. This was about Stark, not Ms. Blake. "And Carter? Tell me about your relationship with him. What do you remember?"

Stark paused for a long time. "We fought a lot. I think I enjoyed it when we'd fight. We got under each other's skin. We were never friends, but somehow I feel closer to him than anyone else in this town." He grew quiet for a second, and Doctor Quinn knew he was holding back. "I... feared him."

"Why would you be afraid of Sheriff Carter, Nathan?"

Another long pause. "Because I… felt something for him that I didn't _want_ to feel. At first I just didn't like him, but somehow the relationship changed. I didn't want to stop hating him, but it was too late. I did my best to fight with him, but even that became more playful, replacing the anger and hate. I just did my best to pretend."

"And how do you feel about the Sheriff, Nathan?"

This time Stark frowned. "I was drawn to his humor, his courage, and his honor. He can see things that the most brilliant minds from all over the world dismiss or ignore. I remember my last moments alive before everything went black. I was staring into his eyes… waiting for death to take me and I was happy he was there to give me the strength to make the ultimate sacrifice. I needed him, and he was there. As much as we fought, he was always there when I needed him the most."

Elaine smiled at Doctor Stark. Much of what he was telling her were things more than likely hidden away in his subconscious. It was amazing what you could learn with a little hypnosis. "You seem to remember quite a bit…."

Stark nodded slowly. "I don't want to remember," he finally admitted.

Doctor Quinn was glad to get to the root of the problem. "Why not?"

"I wasn't happy as that person. I was closed off even to my closest friends. I treated people badly. I don't want to be like that anymore."

"And you think if you remember who you were, that you'll turn back into that cold, and closed off man?"

"I know I will. Carter knows too. He doesn't say anything, but I can see it in his eyes. I… don't want to lose him."

Elaine sighed, understanding his dilemma. "You know what Nathan… I don't think he wants to lose you either," she whispered sadly.

* * *

The artifact. Nathan had called it an akashic field. To know the field was to know everything. To control the field was to be all powerful. Jack had always believed in the age old saying, 'power corrupts.' It didn't matter who you were and where you came from. It never changed. Even Allison had been scared during her time as head of GD. She'd certainly managed to handle her own, and Jack had never been more proud, but he'd also been relieved when someone else had taken her place, someone with her own agendas… her own corruptions. If Nathan really did have the field inside of him, Jack could only imagine how it might change Stark as it had almost changed Kevin. But was it even possible?

Carter watched Nathan walk outside, wave goodbye at Doctor Quinn before getting in the car. "Hey," Jack greeted, trying to sound like himself despite the worries eating at him since his talk with Henry and Allison.

"Hey," Stark greeted back, looking out the window, not even cracking a smile.

"Went that bad?" he questioned, pulling off slowly.

Nathan shook his head. "I'd rather not discuss it, Carter."

The words and tone of voice reminded Jack of the old Nathan Stark almost immediately and he suddenly wasn't sure how to respond. Carter wasn't exactly a fan of therapy, but the Doctors had insisted upon it, and Jack hadn't really blamed them. If Stark were ever to return to his normal self, therapy would more than likely be the thing that helped him. Still, it wasn't easy watching Nathan change so drastically after only an hour. "You uh… okay?" he finally decided to ask, only glancing at him briefly, afraid of what he might see.

Stark let out a long sigh, pinching his nose. "I'm fine… it's just a headache."

"You want me to take you to the Doctor-"

"Jack just… please! No more, Doctors. I just want to get some sleep," he snapped.

Jack didn't say another word for the rest of the ride over to his bunker.

* * *

"You're starting to remember aren't you," Zoe almost whispered as she sipped her ginger ale, watching Nathan finish off his tofu.

Stark paused, his eyes focused on his dinner. Unfortunately he'd learned long ago that keeping secrets from Zoe was near to impossible. Nathan suspected it was a trait she'd received from her mother. "It gets harder and harder to control. Things I want to forget… I remember. Things I want to remember… I can't," he admitted, taking a sip of his wine.

"It's kinda ironic. My father was finally beginning to get over losing you, and then you decide to come back. The worst part is that he has you back, but he's losing you more and more everyday. I guess in the end, nobody gets what they want."

Nathan took in a deep breath before looking up at Jack's daughter, looking into her eyes so wise beyond her years. He sees sympathy in her eyes, and far too much sadness. He suddenly wonders just what Carter went through while he'd been gone. Sleepless nights? Long days? Heartache? To Nathan it was as if time had stood still, but the truth was months had gone by. Ally had grieved his death. He apparently had a memorial at GD. Fargo had picked out the perfect place for his picture… so he'd been told. Henry had claimed the memorial service had been great, with people coming from all over to show their respect. Only he hadn't been dead. "Things can't be like they were, Zoe. Time goes on whether we like it or not. Mess with time and it messes right back." He knew it from experience.

"So am I talking to a new Nathan Stark, or the old one? It's getting hard to tell."

Her eyes have darkened, and Nathan knows she's upset. "There is no old or new… just me," he answered, laying a hand on her own. He didn't pull away when she held onto it for dear life.

"You need time to process it all. I understand that… Dad does too. I just… I like having you here. And not just because you helped me get an 'A' on my project," she told him with a faint smile, making him snort, and smile right back. "I guess I just… want to see him happy. After the divorce there's always been something missing… and I want it back, you know? I want it back for him, and for me."

Stark couldn't help the flutter in the pit of his stomach as he realized what Zoe was trying to say. Nathan had always believed his only chance of having a family was with Allison and Kevin. Zoe was offering him a different kind of family… a family with Jack. "To tell you the truth, Zoe, I'm not really sure what I want yet," he admitted.

"Mind letting us know when you find out?"

Nathan nodded, still smiling as he leaned over and kissed her forehead tenderly. "You'll be the first to know," he assured her.

Zoe's smile grew just a bit. It was a start. "Okay."

* * *

It was almost midnight by the time Jack returned home, completely drained. He'd spent almost six hours at Global after an experiment had gone wrong. Just another day in Eureka. As he walked into his house he froze at the sight that greeted him. Nathan was sitting on the couch, slanted against the arm rest with Zoe leaning against him, her head resting on his chest. Both were fast asleep, lulled by the faint sounds of jazz and a muted football game. He wasn't quite sure where Lexi was, but he was too tired to really care.

With a sigh he grabbed a blanket from upstairs and gently covered the two with it. He just didn't have the heart to wake them. After giving Zoe a gentle kiss on the forehead he walked back upstairs and peeled off his uniform. He'd take a shower in the morning. Once he'd stripped to his boxers he crawled into bed, pulling out the box from under his bed where the logic diamond still sat. He pulled it off its chain as he'd done so many times before and rolled it between his finger tips, trying to figure out why it meant so much to him. He doubted he'd ever know why. Closing his hand into a fist he held onto to the diamond as tight as he could and closed his eyes.

At some time during the night he feels another warm body slide into bed beside him and immediately pull him close. In the back of his mind he knows it's Nathan and he let's the diamond slip from his grasp and fall to the floor as he seeks the warmth... holding it even tighter than he'd held the logic diamond. He soon slips back into unconsciousness... soothed by sounds of Nathan's heart beat and the steadiness of his breathing.

To Be Continued


	4. Chapter 4

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: Thanks guys for all the reviews so far! :D Hopefully you'll like the chapter, it was a pretty hard one to write!

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Four

_He could feel the energy moving through him… a power he would probably never understand no matter how long he studied it. It was beyond comprehension, and he couldn't stop himself from crying out as he felt its burn. In a flash he could see everything and everyone. He could see planets and energies not even yet discovered. It was only a glimpse, but it was enough._

"_Now do you see?" the voice questioned. "Do you see what I see?"_

_All he could do was nod his head in understanding, his body on fire. There was another flash and the words rushed out of him before he could even understand. "See you around, Jack," he whispered and suddenly he felt numb… as if his body was gone leaving him until he was pure energy. He felt no pain. He felt no warmth or cold. He felt nothing._

"_You save me… and I save you."_

_He turned his head to seek out the voice, to understand. The eyes that stare back are familiar and gentle… the eyes of a child. "Kevin?"_

Nathan gasped, sitting up in bed with a start. It felt so real. Too real. As he looked to the side he could see Jack lying beside him still asleep. He didn't understand it. He remembered Kevin… or at least as much as could be expected. He knew Kevin was his stepson, and from what Jack and Allison had told him, loved the boy very much. Although the child was autistic, Stark had no problems believing them both. Allison normally brought the boy every week and Nathan had become attached to Kevin almost as fast as he'd become attached to Zoe. He didn't see the boy very often, but when he did he enjoyed spending time with him, loved to see how artistic and brilliant the boy was. Kevin seemed to love him just as much.

The dream disturbed him. He'd never felt so much pain in his life… that he could remember anyway. Was it simply a nightmare, or had something happened. He couldn't understand. It couldn't have been real… could it? Nathan just didn't know what to believe. He had so many gaps in his mind… so many memories he simply couldn't understand. It was all such a blur. Part of him wanted to tell Carter about the dreams he'd been having, but their relationship was complicated enough as it was. He felt so… lost.

Nathan stroked Jack's face gently in the night before getting up only to feel something strange under his feet. With a sigh he looked down, blindly searching for whatever he'd stepped on in the dark. When his fingertips finally brushed it he immediately grabbed it. It was cool to the touch… smooth and although he couldn't see it very well, he could tell it was a diamond. It looked like part of a necklace, and Nathan immediately recognized it for what it was. A logic diamond… his wedding present to Allison. Stark looked back at Carter who was still blissfully unconscious. He'd told Jack to give the necklace to Allison. Had he done so? Had Allison given it back? He slipped the diamond into his pocket, deciding to speak with Jack about it later, and walked out of the room to get some coffee. It wasn't like he'd be going back to sleep anyway.

* * *

He'd rolled over expecting to find a warm body next to his, but instead had found nothing more than mattress. With a tired groan he opened his eyes to see that Nathan had indeed left. He ignored the part of himself that was disappointed by this, and pulled the covers off as he slowly got up from the bed.

"**Good morning, Sheriff Carter**," greeted S.A.R.A.H. in her usual pleasant tone.

"Morning S.A.R.A.H. Everyone else up yet?" he asked, still a little groggy.

"**Both Zoe Carter and Doctor Stark are currently in the kitchen eating breakfast**."

Jack nodded before grabbing his uniform and heading downstairs to take a shower. He had a feeling he was in for another very long day.

* * *

Zoe could tell the moment she'd walked into the kitchen that something was on Nathan's mind. He had that distant look in his eye, as if he were somewhere else entirely. Her father had often had the same looks when something was bothering him. She hadn't bothered to ask, knowing Stark wouldn't tell her anyway. He was a private man, much like her father, and talking about deep and personal thoughts was not easy for either man. When she'd first seen the two interact she'd been amazed to see how much they'd seemed to dislike each other considering just how similar they really were. They were both stubborn beyond belief, passionate to a fault, and shared a unique sense of humor that was all their own. Yet instead of becoming friends they'd spent more time at each other's necks. At first she'd believed it was because of Allison, but now she knew their tension had come from a very different source.

Zoe had seen how upset her father had been after Stark's supposed death. She'd never actually seen her father cry before… let alone sob uncontrollably. To her it had seemed as if every emotion he'd repressed since Stark had left had finally broken free and rendered him helpless. She'd spent so many months teasing her father about Allison, and all along it had always been Nathan. She couldn't help but wonder what else about her father's past he still kept hidden from her. Had there been other men? Or was Nathan the first her father had fallen for? She'd never even considered that her father might be interested in a man. Nor would she ever have considered that Nathan would be interested in a man… let alone her father.

"Zoe?"

Zoe was pulled from her thoughts, hearing her name being called and looked up at Nathan. "Yeah?"

"When I died… or whatever it was that happened to me… how did your father react?" he asked.

Zoe could see the pleading in Stark's beautiful green eyes, and smiled. "At first? I don't know… he just seemed stressed. He wasn't himself anymore. Everyone could tell he'd taken your death hard, but no one really understood why. I didn't even understand why… until the night before you came back." She wasn't sure how much she should tell Nathan, but she had a feeling it was important.

"What happened?" he asked quietly.

Zoe frowned, looking down at her cereal. "I was in my room studying when I heard something. It sounded like someone was crying, but at first I thought it had to be my aunt. I've never even seen my father cry before. Then when he walked out of my room it got louder and I knew it was Dad. I don't think I've ever been more scared in my life. I didn't know what to do… so I just held him. He looked so lost and I'd never seen him like that before. He's always been so strong you know? I didn't know what else to do. That's kinda when I realized how much he…" Zoe paused, her voice shaking as her memories returned to that night. "That's when I realized how much he loved you."

Nathan was silent for a long time, then looked up just in time to see Zoe's father walk into the kitchen looking completely exhausted. "Morning," he muttered, grabbing a mug to get himself some coffee.

Zoe glanced over at Stark before answering. "Morning, Dad."

"Morning Jack," said Nathan with a gentle smile before he cleared his throat and looked back at his food. Zoe suddenly wasn't hungry anymore, and she had a feeling Nathan wasn't either.

* * *

While Nathan was busy working with Henry on a new project the older man had cooked up, effectively keeping Stark busy and happy, Carter spent his time trying to do his job. It was difficult considering everything weighing on Jack's mind, but he managed to keep focused. "Stop that," he muttered, going through some paperwork at his desk.

"Stop what?" Jo asked him, as she sat at her own desk typing away on the computer.

Jack sighed in annoyance, looking up from his work to glare at his deputy. "You know exactly what… so stop it."

"No I don't, so why don't you tell me," Jo shot back, giving him a glare of her own.

Carter shook his head. "I'm fine."

"I never said you weren't."

"I can take care of myself you know."

"I'm sure you can."

"I appreciate your concern, but there's nothing to worry about!" he told her, growing more frustrated by the second.

"I'm sure there isn't," she agreed.

"Jo!" he finally snapped.

"You know he's starting to remember more and more! Pretty soon he's going to get it all back and I just don't want to see you get your hopes up," she admitted in a rush.

Jack leaned back in his chair, staring at Lupo with a tired smile. As frustrating as it could be sometimes, he liked the fact that Jo cared about him. They'd come a long way since he'd first become Sheriff of Eureka. Their relationship in the beginning had been bumpy at best, but as they'd come to trust in each other, their relationship had transformed. In a way Jo Lupo had become family to Jack, though he doubted he'd ever admit such a thing to her… at least not without a few beers in him. "I'll be careful… I promise," he assured her, looking straight into her eyes, never wavering.

Jo smiled back. "Okay," she agreed, letting her fears drop.

Jack snorted, going back to his work. "I knew you loved me-" he began to tease.

"Careful," Jo warned in annoyance, interrupting him before he'd say something he'd regret… or rather, something she'd make him regret.

Carter just grinned in delight.

* * *

"So… how's things going with Henry and Nathan?" Carter asked, sitting in the chair across from Allison. Ally was sitting at her desk reviewing files from what Jack could see, though what they were about he had no idea.

"Well, nothing's blown up yet, so I'd say things are good," she answered, her eyes focused on the page in front of her.

After Nathan Stark's supposed death Allison had jumped head first into her work, letting it distract her from the loss she'd suffered. He understood better than anyone how much easier it was to simply forget such troubles by burying the memories in work. Even though Nathan had returned, Jack noticed not much had changed, which had surprised him greatly. Instead of wanting to spend time with the man who'd been her fiancé, she'd instead chose to avoid getting too close, as if she were afraid to care about him all over again. He'd see how relieved she'd been when she'd learned he was back. Jack knew she still loved Nathan, yet she'd done nothing but pull away from Stark since he'd returned… keeping her distance. "Allison-"

"It's fine, Jack," she whispered, as if she'd known exactly what he'd been about to say. Jack had a feeling she had. "I always knew…."

Carter frowned, getting up from his seat to walk around the desk. He didn't even hesitate as he pulled her into his arms, holding her just as tight as he felt her hold him. "We'll figure it out," he assured her.

"No Carter," she fought, pulling away. "I had my time with him. It was good. You know I'll always love him… but my time is over."

"Allison, he's remembering more and more everyday. All I ever was to him was a rival… nothing more."

"You're wrong. I know he cared about you… I could see it in his eyes every time you're life was in danger. He never gave up, and he never left your side until he knew you were going to be okay. I know how you feel about him."

Jack looked away, taking Allison's hands in his. "What do I do, Ally? I don't think I can go back to the way things were before-"

"Then don't," she interrupted with a soft smile.

Jack smiled back, not quite sure how to say the words out loud. "I think I love him, Allison," he whispered, his voice hoarse with emotion.

"I know."

It was all that needed to be said between them. During the months they'd thought Stark was dead, they'd come to rely heavily on each other for support. Their relationship had leaped forward in a way neither had expected. Like Jo, Allison wasn't just a friend… she was family. He pulled her into a hug one last time. "I'm sorry I got so angry before." He knew the artifact was a bit of a sore subject with them all. Allison had almost lost her son because of it's power, and he knew she feared losing Stark the same way.

"You had every right to be angry… we should have told you sooner."

Carter sighed. "I know you just wanted to protect me. Just… don't okay? I can take care of myself." It was the second time he'd had to tell someone that, and he silently wondered how many more times he'd have to repeat it.

"I know that too."

Jack smiled, nodding before he pulled away. "I'm going to go check on thing one and thing two… make sure they haven't caused a catastrophe. I'll see you later."

Allison laughed, a real laugh, and turned back to her work. "You do that, Carter. See you later."

Carter walked out of her office, glancing back to see Allison once again reading her files before he headed toward Henry's lab.

To Be Continued


	5. Chapter 5

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Five

"… you nearly blew up my lab," Henry told him with a chuckle, and Nathan could almost picture it.

"I really did that?" he questioned, surprised that he would be so careless.

Henry Deacon simply shrugged, focusing on their project. "Even you were young once, Nathan," he answered.

Stark shook his head, turning around to focus on finishing up the calculations they'd need to run viable simulations testing their 'baby,' as Henry had called it. "Maybe, but what good is it when I can't even remember," he muttered to himself.

"I thought Doctor Quinn was helping?" Henry asked, raising an eyebrow in surprise.

Nathan sighed. "I can remember how I _felt_ about the experiences I actually recall, but I still have trouble remembering my own father's name. Does that sound like progress to you?"

"You just need to give it time… it'll come back to you," Deacon tried to assure him. Somehow the words provided little comfort.

Nathan was tired of being patient. He was tired of giving it time. His relationship with Jack was growing more and more complicated by each passing day. Carter had taken him to Café Diem that morning and he'd felt like a fool when he'd called the owner Victor only to be told by the Sheriff that his name was Vincent. One of the scientists that worked at GD had looked like he'd been sucker-punched when Nathan had admitted to having no memory of the man. Jack had told him his name was Fargo. He remembered a moment in time when Carter had asked a question… _"Who raised you?"_ Although he didn't know how the question had come up, the context mattered little. Nathan didn't even know the answer anymore.

He remembered long nights at Global and Allison's smile. He remembered fighting with Carter and dinners with Kevin. Sometimes he saw flashes of a woman in a blue dress… and he had a feeling she had been his mother, but couldn't be certain. Despite his earlier fears that he wouldn't like the man he'd been before, at least that man had a past. That man knew who he was… whether it was something to be proud of or not. "I'm tired of waiting, Henry. You tell me this story of me as a young scientist, while I was still one of your students, but I don't even remember it. It's just so… frustrating! I don't even know who I am!"

Henry moved away from his work, to sit beside Stark at the computer desk. "You're a scientist," he told him simply, patting his shoulder. "Obviously you haven't forgotten that," he added with a raised eyebrow and a small reassuring smile.

Nathan smiled back, though it was faint. "The Doctors say many of my memories might never return. They say there's no way to tell. I'm just not sure I can accept that anymore," he finally admitted, closing down the work he'd been doing for Henry's project. With a few more clicks of the keyboard something new came into view and Henry immediately frowned. "Apparently I was working on it right before… I went missing for a while."

Henry reached for the mouse, his eyes focused on the computer as he read through the data. "How did you get this?"

Nathan didn't bother answering the question. Breaking into the computer to look at his own files… it was wrong, but in Stark's mind completely justified. He'd only wanted to learn more about himself… instead he'd found the holy grail. It certainly beat the dry reading he'd expected he'd be doing. "The actual device is being stored somewhere, but I couldn't find out where. I don't have the clearance. From what I can tell I designed it to tap into the hippocampus. With a few adjustments it could be used to access short term and long term memories."

Henry pulled his eyes from the computer to look at Stark. "How long have you been thinking about this, Nathan?"

Stark looked at the computer screen. "Only a few days. At first I wasn't even sure I wanted to remember… but then after last night-"

"What happened last night?" Henry interrupted, his frown deepening.

Nathan looked back at the man, hesitant to speak about his dream. He remembered only a few things about the older man. What he remembered most was how much Carter had always relied on and trusted Henry. Although Nathan still found it difficult to trust most he'd met in Eureka, his gut was telling him that he could trust Henry Deacon. "I had this dream… about Kevin… Allison's son. It felt so real, Henry. I think it means something, but I have no idea what. All I know is its important. I need to do this, Henry."

"What about, Jack?" Henry finally asked.

Nathan could feel his heart speed up the moment the name was uttered. He couldn't stop thinking about his conversation with Zoe. In the end her words had only made him realize just how much he needed to remember his past. Jack had loved him… the sarcastic scientist that had done nothing but berate and annoy him. At first Stark had believed if he became that man again, that it would mean losing Jack. What he hadn't realized was the man he'd been so insistent on not becoming, was the man Jack Carter had fallen in love with. "Remembering my past doesn't erase what I've learned since coming back. Therapy may have been rather unsettling, but it did open my eyes. Remembering who I am doesn't mean I have to sacrifice Jack." He could see the doubt in the other man's eyes and took hold of the scientist's arm. "I have to do this, Henry… but I can't do this without you."

Henry nodded, letting out a long breathe. "Okay… but you need to tell, Jack."

Nathan let out a sigh in relief and nodded furiously. "I will."

"And we need to talk to Allison."

"Of course."

"This may not work… you do realize that right?"

Nathan smiled. "You said it yourself… I'm a scientist. We'll make it work."

* * *

While Henry got to work on finding more information on their little 'side project,' Nathan had decided to go out with Jack for lunch. He knew he'd promised Henry he'd tell Jack about their plans, but he wasn't quite sure how to go about it. He didn't want to hurt him. If he went through with the procedure it would mean leaving the bunker and going back to his old life. He knew it was the right choice, but it didn't make it any easier. Nathan watched Jack dig into his food, a small smile on his face as he enjoyed his burger. He can't help but stare. This was the man he remembered. He remembered the Sheriff so clearly compared to everyone else. He remembered Jack's smile, the way his eyes would light up whenever he saw something everyone else took for granted. He remembered Jack's glares whenever Nathan would say something particularly snarky. He doesn't know why… but somehow he remembers Jack.

Perhaps it was because Jack was the last face he saw before everything went black. Perhaps it was because in those few moments as he looked into Jack's eyes… he'd seen something… everything. He'd loved Allison, but he'd ached for Jack. That much he knew without a doubt. When time had stood still, and he could feel his life drain away, he'd held on to Jack's eyes. In his mind and in his heart. His face had been the first one he saw when he'd breathed air once again. When his senses had been in overload, and he'd felt lost and confused… Jack had been there to make the pain go away. When he hadn't even remembered his own name, his family, his life… he had remembered Jack.

Jack had left an imprint in Nathan that could not be ignored. He didn't know how, but he did know it was there. It was perhaps the only thing he was sure of anymore. So how could he tell the man that had given him so much that he wanted more? Nathan wasn't sure he could ever really return to his old life. Too much had happened since then. His recent brush with death had opened his eyes in ways no one else would ever truly understand. Even with his memories returned in tact, he would never be the same… but he knew Jack wasn't so sure. He could see the fear there. The more Nathan remembered, the harder it was… the more complicated things became. He knew with his memories returned that things would change, but he'd been telling Henry the truth when he'd said his feelings for Jack would not. Convincing Jack that of that would be much more of a challenge.

"You planning to eat anytime soon, or are you just going to sit there and stare at me all day?" Jack asked an amused look on his face.

"What?" Nathan had been so lost in thought he hadn't realized he'd been staring.

Carter shook his head, looking over at Stark's untouched food. "You okay?" he asked softly.

"I'm fine… I just… I was just thinking."

"About that project you and Henry are working on?" Carter questioned.

Nathan wanted to tell him. He wanted to explain. He knew he'd have to tell him eventually, but he couldn't. The words refused to come. He wasn't ready. "Yeah," he lied, looking down at his food. "The project."

Jack frowned at him, his blue eyes revealing the worry beneath the surface before he looked away. "Right…."

* * *

"Shit! Shit, shit, shit!" Jack swore, looking around his room. Where the hell could it be?

"Dad? You okay?"

"Uh Zoe! Have you seen a crystal anywhere… it's a necklace. I've been looking for it everywhere… even had S.A.R.A.H. scan for it, but it's not here," he told her, getting desperate. He couldn't believe he'd lost it! It wasn't even his! It was for Allison, and he'd lost it!

"No… I haven't seen it anywhere. Maybe Nathan knows where it is," she offered before walking to her room, closing the door behind her.

Jack frowned, hoping he didn't. That was the last thing he needed to deal with. It had to be in the house… somewhere. When Lexi got in he'd have to ask her. It was possible she'd found it. Jack was getting desperate. He needed to find that logic diamond. He just hoped to God that Nathan didn't have it. "Shit!"

* * *

Nathan turned off the message, his eyes moving down to the logic diamond he'd meant to give Allison. His laptop sat in his lap. He'd connected the diamond to his computer to see the message… his memories were still extremely foggy when it came to Allison. He knew it'd been very important. He'd known how important the diamond had been to him. He could almost remember recording the message if he closed his eyes and focused hard enough. A box appeared in the middle of the screen… 'ERASE MESSAGE?' Nathan's hand drifted over the keyboard, his finger laid gently over the button that would carry out the command. He couldn't help but hesitate. He closed his eyes once more, trying to imagine Allison's face.

He thought of her smile. He thought of her laugh. He thought of the time they'd spent together. He thought of their marriage. He could see flashes in his mind… some clearer than others. He could see their first kiss… how nervous he'd been on their first date. He'd never been so nervous before. He remembered their dinners together… wine and dancing. Nathan could see through the fog for a brief moment before his eyes reopened and Allison's brown eyes turned to blue. When he closed his eyes again Allison was replaced with Jack. He knew what he had to do as he pressed the key underneath his finger tips, and silently said goodbye to the past… embracing his future.

'MESSAGE ERASED.'

Nathan closed his laptop and disconnected the logic diamond, putting it back in the draw next to his bed.

To Be Continued


	6. Chapter 6

See You Around

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: I did promise angst right? Lol Don't hate me! :D

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Six

"Have you talked to Carter about this?"

Nathan had been dreading the question he knew would come the moment he'd decided to bite the bullet and tell Allison about his plan. Nathan immediately grew defensive. "No, and I can't really see why that would be important. Jack has nothing to do with this. This is my choice, not his."

Allison frowned, leaning against Thorne's desk with a sigh. Thorne had asked Blake to fill in while she took a quick trip back to Washington to report on her progress. "Nathan… I wasn't trying to imply anything… I just think he'd want to know about this. You know he cares about what happens to you."

Nathan knew she was only thinking of Jack's feelings. It seemed everyone in the town was protective of the Sheriff. Stark couldn't really be surprised as Jack was a very funny and endearing person. It seemed only right that the town adore him, but Stark had no plans of hurting Carter. Wanting his memories back didn't mean losing Carter, though it seemed to everyone else that it'd be inevitable. "I care what happens to him too," he assured her calmly. Allison frowned. "What?"

"Nothing… I just…" Allison shook her head smiling faintly. "Months ago and I'd never have imagined you saying you care about Carter."

Stark stared into her eyes, holding them, completely serious. "I've always cared about, Jack." It was true. He always had. He hid it well, but he knew it to be true. He remembered that part clearly. Anytime Jack had ever been hurt Nathan had always been worried, afraid he'd lose the Sheriff. He simply had a good poker face.

Allison looked away, her voice suddenly shaky. "Apparently so."

He could tell then that Blake was upset about something, and Nathan had a fairly good idea as to why. Jack had told him the nature of his relationship with Allison. They'd been married once, and were planning on remarrying. Only they never made it because instead he'd gone and gotten himself killed… kind of. He could see in her eyes that she longed for him the way he could never long for her. Perhaps in time she would understand why he could never be with her… not after what he'd discovered about himself. His heart would always belong to Jack. Nathan would never stop loving Ally… how could he not? She'd been his wife, but that didn't mean they were meant to be. "I'm sorry," he spoke in a whisper before taking one of her hands and laying the logic diamond inside, closing her hand around the gift. "It was supposed to be a wedding present. I know there's no wedding… can never be a wedding… but I want you to have it. I don't remember much about our life together, but I do know we had some good times together. I don't want you to forget that."

Allison nodded, her smile returning, though he could see the tears in her eyes. She refused to let them fall. "I won't, believe me." They caught each other's eye for a moment and Nathan could see both the pain and the peace. The fear and the acceptance. He knew one day they would be fine. Stark's heart almost broke to see her upset and he did the only thing he knew to do, and pulled her into his arms for one final goodbye. He held her, closing his eyes tight as he felt her release a breath and hug him back. He knew how hard it had to be for her, and although he wouldn't ignore his feelings, he also couldn't ignore how important Allison had been to him once.

"I will always love you, Ally," he whispered to her, and pulled away just enough to give her one last kiss.

Allison smiled as he pulled away, wiping away her tears. "You and Carter… take care of each other."

Nathan smiled back at her. "You don't even have to ask," he assured her before he moved away, walking toward the door.

"Nathan," Allison called before he could leave. Stark turned back around to look at her. "You need to tell Jack what you plan to do. Please… just tell him."

"I will… I promise. Just give me some time."

Blake nodded once. "Okay."

* * *

Jack knew he was running out of excuses for visiting GD, but he didn't really care. He needed to talk to Stark. He'd talked to Zoe and Lexi and neither had seen the logic diamond, which meant it was more than likely found by Nathan. He knew he'd have a lot of explaining to do, but he also knew he couldn't just run away or ignore the fact that he'd failed to give the necklace to its rightful owner. "Hey Fargo, have you seen Stark anywhere?" Jack asked as he walked over to the younger man's desk.

Fargo looked up and frowned. "Umm, last I saw him he was in Thorne's office with Doctor Blake."

"Thorne's office? I thought she'd left last night for Washington?" Carter questioned.

"Doctor Blake's filling in while she's away. I saw them in there not but five minutes ago. If you want to catch him he's probably there, Sheriff."

Jack sighed. "Right… thanks, Fargo!" he spoke over his shoulder, rushing toward the office.

"Anytime Sheriff… uh… is Lexi with you?" he called out.

Carter rolled his eyes, turning back around. "Fargo seriously… get a life," he spoke in annoyance, getting very tired of having to beat guys off his baby sister. Jack turned back around and walked down the hallway that would lead to Thorne's office. It was time to face the music.

* * *

There was no way to describe just how it felt to be standing in the middle of GD staring up like an idiot only to watch the man he loved kiss Allison Blake. But no, it was far worse than that. First he'd given her the necklace, the logic diamond, his wedding present to her… and then he'd given her a hug. He'd held her tight, a familiar hug he'd seen pass between them many times in the past when one or the other was upset, and once again he was there watching. Then finally he'd pulled away from her and given her one very tender kiss. The kiss cut him the deepest, just a simple caress of lips, yet he felt like he'd just had his heart ripped from his chest and thrown away like trash. Jack felt like an idiot, a hopeless idiot. What had he expected? Had he ever really had a chance to begin with? Obviously not.

It didn't hurt him so much that Allison was kissing him back despite knowing how Jack felt. He understood better than anyone how it felt to fall for a man like Nathan Stark. They'd been married! Were about to marry for the second time! He still remembered his desperation the day of their wedding, his own kiss shared with Allison before she flat out told him her heart would always belong to Nathan. At the time he'd been so confused about who he cared about it hadn't even mattered anymore. He'd handled the rejection well, because in the end he'd known all along they weren't right for each other. She was beautiful, smart, and he would always be attracted to her, but in the end he'd needed more than that, just as she had. It hadn't been until the moment he watched Nathan put his life at risk that he'd realized the truth. He'd been so clueless before, but that one moment in time had told him everything he'd needed to know. Jack Carter was in love with Nathan Stark… and now he'd been rejected by Nathan too. He wasn't really surprised, but that didn't make it hurt any less.

As Nathan pulled away from the kiss, Jack backed away, turning around for fear of seeing anymore. He wasn't sure where to go. Part of him just wanted to run… anywhere, get away from everything so he could break down in peace, but that wasn't the way he worked. He was much stronger than that. He'd survived his divorce… losing Abby. He'd spent months surviving when he'd thought Stark was dead. He'd survived being rejected by Allison. He would survive being rejected by Nathan as well.

It takes him a minute to realize he's been walking the hallways of GD aimlessly until finally stopping in front of Henry's lab. With a deep breath he walked inside, not sure he was quite ready to be alone yet. "Henry?" he called, finally seeing him with his eyes focused on the computer as he typed away, obviously in the middle of something important.

Henry turned and smiled at Jack. "Hey Jack, what brings you by?" he questioned.

Carter shook his head, clearing his throat, though unable to swallow the lump that had formed since seeing Nathan and Allison together. "Uh nothing… I just… uh I was just checking on everything. What you working on?" he asked, wanting to think of something else. He needed a distraction desperately, and he still had a few hours before the end of his shift.

Henry turned back to the computer, then glanced at the machine now in the middle of his lab. The device looked slightly familiar. There was a chair in the middle for someone to sit; with little wires hanging down… it obviously wasn't finished. Carter touched the smooth metal, realizing how similar it was to the device he'd found himself in over a year ago when the town had almost caused world war three after Fargo had turned on a doom device. It had taken months for the memories he'd obtained from the older man, Doctor Irvin Thatcher, to filter and finally be forgotten. Seeing another person's memories had been an intense experience that he would never want to repeat again. He'd never felt so confused, which was saying a lot considering just how normal confusion became in a town like Eureka. "Stark and I've been working on it non-stop for days. This is the device Nathan hopes will allow him to access his memories."

"What?" Carter questioned, looking up from the machine in surprise.

"Nathan didn't tell you?" Henry asked.

Jack shook his head. Perhaps it would have been better had he not even gotten up this morning. "No… he didn't mention it."

Henry frowned. "I'm sorry Jack; I thought he'd have told you by now. He promised me he would."

Jack shook his head. It made sense. He wanted to return to his old life before his would-be death. How could Jack really blame him? He was stuck in between while recovering from his return. He was capable of working, but he barely had any memories of his life before. It was only natural that he'd eventually turn to science to speed up the process. It also explained why he'd been so distant in the last few days, spending all his time at GD or doing work on his laptop when back at the bunker. Carter really had been blind.

"You okay?" Henry asked gently.

Jack looked up at the scientist, trying to give him a small smile to assure him. He didn't feel okay, but that didn't really matter anymore. "I'm fine, Henry. Is there any danger?" he questioned. If the device was anything like the one he'd been in with Thatcher he had every reason to worry.

"Right now there is a possibility of brain damage, but we've been working diligently to minimize the risks," Henry answered him honestly.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Figures. Just… just make sure he doesn't do anything stupid. This town has already lost him once…" he said, his eyes pleading that Henry look out for Nathan. Sometimes loving someone meant thinking of them before one's self. Despite everything, Jack still cared about Stark.

Henry nodded, his frown deepening.

"Thanks," he finally whispered, backing away. He needed to go. He needed to work… get as far away from GD as he could. "I'll uh… see you later, Henry."

"See you around, Jack," Henry said and Jack could feel his chest tighten at the words.

* * *

"I thought you were going to tell Jack about the experiment," Henry confronted.

Nathan froze at the door, seeing the anger in the other man's eyes. "I am… I just came back from telling Allison. I just… hadn't found the right way to tell him yet," he tried to explain.

"Well, don't worry about it now… he knows," Henry almost snapped. "You should have told me you hadn't told him yet!"

Stark frowned. "Oh shit, he was here? How did he react?"

"How do you think?"

Nathan shook his head. Just when things were finally starting to work themselves out…. "I need to talk to him, is he still here?"

Henry shook his head. "No, he left a little over a half an hour ago. Maybe you should wait until after his shift is over."

Nathan sighed, rubbing his eyes. "Fine…." This did not bode well… not at all.

* * *

"Oh thank god! Nathan!" Zoe breathed in relief, making Stark frown as he walked through the bunker door.

"Zoe? What's wrong?" Nathan questioned, seeing the worry in her eyes. He knew it had to be bad. He could see the fear in her eyes. He'd spent hours at GD trying to figure out how he was going to explain himself to Carter, a little worried about how Jack would react. He knew he should have told him sooner about his plan. "Where's Jack?"

Zoe took a deep breathe. "I… I don't know. Jo just called and said he never came back to the sheriff's office to finish off the rest of his shift, after visiting GD this afternoon. She's tried to get him on the radio. I've tried calling him a few times, but he isn't answering. I tried calling you but your phone was off and Lexi's with Jo trying to figure out where he is!" She was talking a mile a minute, obviously panicking.

Nathan groaned, hoping to god that he hadn't gone and done something stupid. "Okay, okay… we'll find him. It's going to be okay."

"No Nathan, it's not! My Dad should be home by now! It's almost ten o'clock and he's been missing since lunch! What if he's hurt?! What if some freaky GD project made him disappear or turn invisible again?! We have to find him!"

"We will," he assured her, gently grabbing onto her shoulders, hoping the contact will help her calm down. His mind was in a whirl as he tried to think of places Jack might have gone. "Has Jo contacted Henry and Allison?"

"She just called them like a minute ago. Allison said he signed out around one o'clock… Fargo said he looked really upset about something," Zoe answered, taking a few deep breaths afterward.

Nathan closed his eyes for a brief moment, cursing his own stupidity. He'd never expected Jack to be so upset upon learning of his plan to restore his memories. There had to be more going on. "Get your jacket… we're going out to find your Dad. You drive."

"Jo told me to stay here," Zoe fought, although he could see the conflict in her eyes. "He might come back home."

"S.A.R.A.H. can alert us if he returns, but right now I'm not supposed to be driving in my condition which means I need your help if we're going to find your Dad. Get your coat," he told her, trying to remain calm for Zoe's sake.

Zoe nodded, rushing up the stairs to her room. Nathan ran a hand through his hair and sighed.

"Dammit Jack," he muttered to himself before pulling out his cell phone to give Lupo a call. His heart was beating hard and fast, unable to ignore the feeling that something was very wrong. He just hoped he wasn't too late to correct his mistake.

To Be Continued


	7. Chapter 7

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: Sorry about the cliffhanger, but I just couldn't help myself! All I can say is… I love writing angst! :D Thanks for all the reviews so far, you guys have been great encouragement to help me continue this story!

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Seven

He'd only meant to take a short drive, just to get away for awhile. He needed time to think, time to be alone and process just how screwed up his life had become. He was almost middle aged, divorced, and he'd fallen for a man who was obviously still in love with his ex-wife. It didn't get much better than that. He'd spent months in agony, trying to get through Nathan Stark's death, only for him to reappear out of the blue with absolutely no memory of his past, which had allowed Jack to finally express just how he felt about the man. He hadn't even had the balls to tell him he was working with Henry on a device that would allow him to access the memories he'd lost since returning to Eureka! No matter how hard he tried he couldn't get that kiss out of his head. He felt like such a fool. How could he have allowed himself to believe there might be a chance between him and Nathan?! How could he have been so stupid?

Months! Two months he'd spent trying to get past Nathan's death! For two months he'd been in silent agony, mourning the loss of a man everyone thought he'd hated! For two months he'd replayed that moment over and over again… watching in his mind's eye as Nathan willingly sacrificed himself to save the town… to save Ally. He'd said it himself. He'd done it to save Allison. He'd loved Allison. Not him… Allison. Jack wiped his eye, refusing to let himself cry. He wasn't that kind of person. He didn't cry… but he had. The night before Nathan had come back alive and well he'd cried… cried in his daughter's arms like a child for the man he'd loved… would always love. For all their bickering, for all their banter, he'd always loved Nathan's passion for science, his sharp personality. He'd loved the challenge Nathan would give him on a regular basis.

Jack knew he shouldn't be driving while so upset, but he ignored the voice in the back of his head, too angry and frustrated to care. He didn't want to love Stark! He wanted to hate him! He wanted to hate him and Allison both! He wanted to be angry that they had each other while he was alone! He wanted to be angry. He wanted to scream. He wanted to lash out. He wanted to hit something! He wanted to run away! He drove faster and faster, not quite realizing where he was going until he recognized the clearing where he'd found Nathan naked, but alive weeks before.

'_See you around, Jack.'_

The words played over and over in his mind, haunting him. Stark hadn't been able to say goodbye, and as it turned out it hadn't been goodbye. They'd seen each other again, but the impact of those words had changed everything in Jack's life since the moment Nathan had disappeared. His nights had been filled with nightmares of that moment in time. Sleepless nights. He'd thought he would lose his mind if he didn't find a way to deal. Then Nathan had returned, and for a brief moment Jack had contemplated finally telling Stark how he really felt… telling him the truth, but what was the point? They'd spent almost two years fighting over Allison. In the end Jack had fallen for Nathan, and Nathan had gotten Allison.

Stark had seen him as competition, and for awhile he had been, but it seemed their little love triangle was not content… wanted to be far more complicated. Jack was tired. He was tired of the triangle. He was tired of the fighting. And frankly, he was getting very tired of Eureka! Eureka and its town of brilliant scientists bent on destroying the whole damn planet with their ideas. Scientists that felt it was worth all the risks, even if those risks involved people dying or the universe blinking out of existence! People bent on putting Carter through hell day in and day out all in the name of furthering science!

In California the only thing he'd ever had to worry about was finding the next bad guy and sending him back to where he belonged. He'd been a US Marshall, and damned good at it. There were no devices, no time loops, no people coming back from the dead, and life was simple. Life was good. His family life had been a wreak, that was true, but he'd been happy just the same. Then he'd found himself in Eureka, in some quaint little town. He'd made friends. He'd learned to adapt. Then he'd met Nathan Stark… former director of Global Dynamics, bane of his existence, and stealer of hearts. Jack almost had to laugh at the irony. How it was possible to hate and love someone simultaneously, Jack would never know, but god that's how he'd felt almost since the very day he'd met the scientist!

Jack groaned as he saw a flash, picturing Nathan and Allison's kiss in his mind. The imagine overwhelmed him until he couldn't breathe, couldn't think. And that was the exact moment that he watched Einstein jump out from the woods and into the street. It was strangely ironic that Einstein, the very dog responsible for him crashing and coming across the town of Eureka, would pick such a moment to repeat his mistake at such a pivotal moment in time when he was contemplating leaving that same town. Jack swerved to avoid the animal, cursing as he realized just how screwed his was. The car flew off the road, immediately rolling. Carter grunted as he jerked against the seat belt, only to cry out as something from the back seat flew forward and connected with his skull. He barely registered the pain. The entire sequence of events seemed to happen in slow motion, like a motive slowing down for dramatic affect. When he finally realized the car had stopped rolling he was losing consciousness fast. The car had flipped upside down and he could already feel the blood draining to his head. He struggled to breathe, trying desperately to free himself from his seat belt, but he could barely move a muscle. Everything began to fade to nothingness, and the last thing he could think about before falling into oblivion was the same thing he'd been thinking about since the moment he'd watched Nathan Stark kiss Allison Blake. He never should have gotten up this morning.

* * *

"Nathan, where are we going?"

"The clearing where they found me a few weeks ago," Nathan answered her, trying Carter's cell for the hundredth time.

"Why there? What would he be doing there?"

Nathan shook his head. "I don't know, but he was there when I reappeared… maybe we'll get lucky. I don't know… it's just a feeling."

Zoe glanced at Stark for a moment before focusing on the road. "There's something you're not telling me…."

She was a bright woman. Stark had known all along that it wouldn't take long for her to realize something was wrong. Like her father, she possessed a keen eye for such things. "Remember that conversation we had… about letting you know when I've made a choice?" he asked, his voice faint as he looked out the window, not quite ready to face her.

"You're choosing Allison, aren't you?" she spoke, and it pierced his heart to hear her sound so upset. Over the weeks that he'd gotten close to Zoe, gotten to know the young woman, he'd realized just how amazing she was. He'd never really known her before, of that he was sure. He remembered brief moments in passing, but nothing else.

"No Zoe… I'm not. I figured it was about time I stopped living in the past. I'm in love with your father, Zoe."

She didn't say a word for the longest time, and Nathan soon turned to look at her. It was only then that he realized she was fighting back tears.

"Zoe?"

Zoe shook her head, wiping them away quickly. "I'm fine, I'm fine… I just… we've got to find him, Nathan."

"We will," he assured her, moving a hand to squeeze her shoulder, hoping the contact would help somehow. He wanted nothing more than to protect her from the fear and worry he knew she was experiencing. It was then that Nathan noticed something in the distance up the road. "Zoe?"

"I see it!" she shouted. "Oh my god!" she gasped, her eyes suddenly wide in fear. "Dad!" Zoe immediately pulled over and undid her seat belt in record timing, as Nathan did the same.

"Jack?!" he shouted, rushing past Zoe to check and see how bad the wreckage was, and whether Jack had survived. The window in Carter's door was broken and Stark immediately reached in to check for a pulse. He sighed in relief the moment he felt the steady rhythm, though faint, and turned back to look at Zoe. "Zoe, call Jo and Allison! Tell Ally to send paramedics! Jack's in bad shape! Hurry!" he ordered, pulling the door open, wincing at the sound of metal against metal. He felt a sharp pain in his hand as he got the door to open, knowing he'd probably cut himself. He didn't care. All he could focus on was getting Jack out of the car… and seeing him safe. "Jack?! Don't do this to me! Not now! Jack?!" he shouted, reaching in to unhook his seatbelt and pull him out of the car. "Come on Jack, wake up!"

* * *

It'd taken a half an hour for paramedics to arrive, and everything else had become one big blur to Nathan. When they'd arrived he'd been just sitting by the car, holding Jack in his arms, barely aware of anything else. He knew he'd looked pretty bad. They'd taken him back to GD where Nathan and Zoe had spent an hour pacing back and forth waiting for news. He didn't even notice the red stains on his shirt… Jack's blood. Allison had told him to go home and change… that she would tell him and Zoe when she knew something, but they'd refused to leave. By the second hour Nathan was sitting in a chair, Zoe's head in his lap as she slept. Jo had stopped by to see if they'd heard any news before being called elsewhere.

Finally by the third hour Allison had walked back into the waiting room. "Can we see him?" Nathan asked her.

Allison frowned, looking over at Zoe Carter. "Zoe, why don't you go visit with your father for a second while I talk to Nathan, okay?"

Zoe nodded, glancing back at Stark for a moment before walking into the room to see her father.

Stark folded his arms, bracing himself. "Is it bad?"

Blake shook her head, smiling faintly. "He's going to be fine. He's got a bad concussion and a few broken ribs. We managed to stop the internal bleeding, but he's going to have to stay here a few days to recover. If you hadn't found him when you did… he probably wouldn't have lasted much longer. You did good, Nathan."

"This is my fault. I should have told him about the device."

"You don't even know what happened, Nathan. Don't blame yourself-"

"Allison, Zoe said that Farger guy saw Carter leave… he was upset. How can I not blame myself?!"

"First of all… his name is Fargo. Second of all, just because he was upset doesn't mean you caused his car to run off the road. Carter hasn't even woken up yet. We don't know what happened, so stop beating yourself up."

Nathan frowned, realizing she was right. His guilt solved nothing, and certainly didn't help Jack or Zoe in any way. "Can I see him?" he asked his voice faint.

"Go," was all she said, and all Nathan needed before he rushed inside to check on Jack.

* * *

He could hear the faint beep of a monitor even before he opened his eyes. The rhythm he'd heard so many times before. It was a steady beep, a reminder that he was in fact alive. Soon his other senses awoke and he could smell the filtered air of Global Dynamics. His hand twitched a strange sensation as he realized someone was holding his hand tightly. Finally he opened his eyes and looked around. The light made his eyes tear up just a bit before they finally adjusted and he could see once more. Jack slowly looked down to see his daughter to his left, eyes closed as she slept. To his right Nathan Stark had his head lying on the bed, his left hand in Jack's right… also fast asleep. Carter pulled his hand from Nathan's and ran it gently through the black curls for a moment before pulling away with a sad sigh. "Stark?" he spoke in a whisper, so as not to wake up Zoe. "Stark?"

Nathan stiffened for a moment, lifting up his head slowly, his eyes blinking sleepily. Finally the green eyes focused on Jack, and he was wide awake. "Jack? You're awake!"

Carter swallowed the lump in his throat, holding back the rush of emotions. "What happened?"

"What do you remember?"

"I was driving… I saw Einstein… damn dog has a death wish. I almost hit him. I swerved and flew off the road. That's the last thing I remember," he answered, his voice slightly rough.

Nathan nodded, reaching for his hand once more, and Carter frowned. "Don't you ever scare us like that again. We couldn't find you…. What were you doing over there anyway? Do you have any idea how lucky you are right now? You could have been killed!" Stark snapped, visibly upset.

"I just needed to get away for awhile," Jack told him, pulling his hand away from Stark's.

"Yes, and while you were out getting away your daughter was at home scared out of her mind that she wouldn't see her father again! Dammit Jack!"

It took Carter a moment to realize just how upset Nathan was. His voice was shaky, and his eyes were watering just a bit. He looked like hell. Jack swallowed hard when he then noticed the blood stains on Stark's shirt… his blood, he realized. "I'm fine, Nathan."

Stark paused, staring at him for what seemed a full minute. The scientist took a long breath and shook his head. "I'm sorry… I should have told you about the device me and Henry were working on. I should have told you about my plan. I wanted to tell you… I just didn't want to upset you. I just-"

"It's okay," Jack interrupted. "It's not like you owe me anything… you don't owe me an explanation. It's not like we mean anything to each other, right? Before you came back from the dead we weren't even friends."

Nathan frowned, looking away and Carter couldn't help but wonder if his words had upset him further. Finally he nodded and stood. "I uh… excuse me… I'll be back. I should tell Allison you're awake," he spoke and left without another word.

Jack watched him go, hearing the door close behind the scientist. "Right…."

* * *

"You didn't hear how he said it, Henry. You weren't there," Stark argued, running a hand through his hair.

"Nathan, what did you expect? He was upset… and stubborn, a quality you and he seem to share."

"Weren't even friends. He's got that right. We weren't, Henry. We were enemies. I remember that much. We were always butting heads! We fought constantly. We were rivals… nothing more."

"You can't take what he said to heart. You know he didn't mean it. He does care about you," Henry fought. He knew Stark was upset, could see it in the other man's eyes. He'd been hurt by what Jack had said. "Nathan, you need to tell him how you feel. He needs to hear it."

Stark immediately shook his head. "No… I can't. Not after what happened… not after what he said. He made his position quite clear, Henry."

"Nathan-"

"No!" Stark snapped, interrupting him. "Just… stop. It's over. Let's just finish this device."

Henry stared into Nathan's green eyes, seeing the pain there, and the fear. "It doesn't have to be over. You almost lost Jack today… what about the next time? Believe me, Nathan, you don't want to live your life full of regrets," he warned, trying to keep his voice leveled despite the memories of Kim that washed over him.

Nathan turned away, shaking his head. "We have work to do," was all he said in return.

Henry let out a sigh, turning back to his own computer. Nathan Stark could be damned stubborn when he wanted to be….

To Be Continued


	8. Chapter 8

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: You're suffering is almost over! :D Just a few more chapters left! Yay! I'm doing my best to get this story finished, especially since I have another story idea in the works. Yeah, I know, bit surprise there! lol

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Eight

_Beverly stood at a distance. It sickened him to make a deal with the devil, but at least it would help him save Kevin. He wanted no more deaths. He couldn't watch another person he cared about be killed because of the field. He had to save Kevin, and he knew he would… he had the answer. If only Allison would trust him! Henry rested his hand on Kevin's shoulder. There was no fear in the boy's eyes. He seemed to understand in a way he never would have before. "Don't worry Kevin, everything's going to be okay," he assured the boy, giving his shoulder a gentle squeeze._

_The boy shook his head sadly. "Not for everyone," Kevin promised._

_Henry looked up at Allison, seeing her confusion. He wasn't sure what the boy was talking about, but he didn't bother to ask. Instead he led the boy away and prayed he was doing the right thing._

_FLASH!_

_Suddenly his surroundings changed as he watched Fargo pull him inside one of the nearby tents, the younger man's eyes were red, and Henry suddenly had a bad feeling. "What is it, Fargo, I do have a wedding to prepare for?" he asked._

_Fargo shook his head, clearing his throat. "No… you don't. It's Doctor Stark… he's uh… he's dead," Fargo whispered, his voice weak._

_He'd felt as if he'd been hit by a bus, his chest tightened immediately. His heart was suddenly pounding as he rushed out of the tent in time to see Jack walking Allison out of the tent and giving her to Jo Lupo. Jack paused, looking up at him, and Henry could see the pain in the other man's eyes while Allison cried in Lupo's arms, still in her wedding dress. Another fellow scientist, another friend… gone. Jack's eyes had lost the spark he usually saw… instead they were empty, as if he'd lost a very important part of himself. It was then that Henry knew Fargo's words were true. Nathan Stark was dead. It didn't matter how. It didn't matter when. All that mattered was he was gone… and he was never coming back._

Henry awoke with a start, panting as he tried to catch his breath. He could hear his alarm clock going off beside him. With a groan he rubbed his face, trying to shake the images that only brought him confusion. He needed to get back to GD….

* * *

Zoe's eyes fluttered open, and she let out a small moan as she stretched in her bed, not really ready to leave just yet. It was a Saturday morning, which meant no school… which meant she could easily stay in bed for as long as she wished, but her father was stuck in an infirmary bed at GD, and Zoe had no intention of staying in bed resting while her father was recovering from a car accident. Zoe forced herself out of bed, eager to get on with her day so she could see her Dad. She throws on whatever she sees and rushes down the steps to the smell of coffee. "Aunt Lexi?" she calls, walking into the kitchen to see her aunt drinking coffee and eating breakfast in her pajamas.

"Hey," her aunt greets her, kissing her forehead. "Sleep okay?"

Zoe frowned, pouring herself a cup of coffee. "Okay I guess. I was thinking we could go see, Dad this morning."

Lexi rolled her eyes. "I thought you might. For a minute there I thought it was gonna take the grace of God to get you outta there."

"He's my Dad," was her only answer. She was tired and worried and she didn't feel like explaining herself.

Lexi smiled sadly. "I know, sweetie. Okay, give me a sec to get dressed and then we'll go. Sound good?"

Zoe nodded, taking a sip of the warm liquid she'd been without for so long. It felt good, like coming home after a very long vacation. Thankfully she knew Lexi would have no problems with her drinking coffee… unlike her father. Today, she felt she needed the cup more than anything. If Nathan hadn't been there to calm her down she was sure she would have had a panic attack. She'd never been so worried, especially when she'd seen him lying there… his car rolled on its top. She watched her aunt frown, looking back at her.

"It's going to be okay… promise," she whispered before rushing up the stairs to get changed.

Zoe knew she was trying to make her feel better, but she wasn't so sure. Something was very wrong about her father, and it had nothing to do with the car accident. When she'd finally awakened her father had been physically okay. He had a feel broken ribs and a bad concussion, but bones would heal and so would his head. The heart was another matter entirely. She'd noticed how distant he was almost immediately. The second thing she'd noticed was that Nathan was nowhere in sight. Her Dad had told her he'd gone to get Allison, but even when Allison had come Stark had not returned. Allison had explained that he'd gone back to his work, but it didn't make sense. Something was wrong and she needed to know what had happened while she'd been sleeping. She needed to see Nathan, and he hadn't come home with her and Lexi, which meant he was still at GD, which was exactly where she needed to be.

* * *

"Doctor Stark? Um Doctor Stark?"

Nathan opened his eyes slowly, hearing the faint sound of someone calling his name. He must have fallen asleep on his desk. As he moved his head he could feel how stiff his back felt, and knew he'd indeed fallen asleep sometime during the night. Finally he sat up with some effort, rolling his neck as he tried to loosen the knots. He could see a man with black glasses standing over him.

"I have the latest test results for the um… project."

"It's not classified Fargner, you can call it by its name," he muttered in annoyance.

"It's Fargo," the man corrected.

Stark rubbed his eyes, still trying to wake up completely. "What?"

"My name… Douglas Fargo."

Nathan frowned. "Huh," was all he said, snatching the folder in the other man's hand. At first glance the raw data looked good. If it all checked out they'd be ready for animal testing, which meant he'd be on his way to finally unlocking all his memories. "When can we start animal testing?"

"Um Doctor Blake believes by the end of the week if she can get the sign off. A number of people have been interested in other possible applications for the 'Retriever,' especially in regards to Alzheimer's disease. She believes we'll get the green light a lot quicker than we'd first hoped."

The 'Retriever' had been a name dubbed by Henry since the very beginning. Nathan wasn't exactly fond of it, but it beat the very long name he'd found in the files he'd left before his disappearing act. "Good, thank you, Faro."

The man frowned before turning and walking out just as Henry was entering the lab. "Fargo! Fargo! Why is that so hard to remember?! I only worked with the man for almost seven years!" he muttered.

Henry paused, raising an eyebrow as he watched him leave. Stark smiled, amused. "You know, keep it up and you're gonna send that kid right over the edge," Henry warned.

Nathan shrugged. "It amuses me," was his only excuse. As it was, it was proving to be the only source of amusement he had left with the way things had been going. Nathan handed Henry the raw data they'd collected from their last test.

Henry gave it a quick glance before looking back at Stark. "Tell me you haven't been here all night."

Nathan turned around, suppressing a groan, as he faced his computer and got it ready for him to input the new data. "Would you rather I say nothing then?" It wasn't like he could stay at the bunker anymore, regardless as to whether Carter was there or not.

"Nathan, you need to talk to Jack. You can't let this drag on… it's not healthy. You're making a mistake… why can't you see that?"

"Drop it, Henry," he told the man sternly, leaving no room for debate.

Henry sighed, taking a seat beside him. "I swear you two were meant for each other… as stubborn and pig-headed as you both are!"

Nathan rolled his eyes, but said nothing.

* * *

It was late in the afternoon and Henry had left for lunch, leaving Nathan by himself to work. Stark remembered working. He remembered how good it felt to focus on the science, forcing everything else, all his problems, troubles, worries, to the back of his mind. It was his Zen, his peace. It was his greatest escape. "Nathan?" Unfortunately, his work could not always protect him from the issues he could never truly forget.

Nathan turned to see Zoe walk into his lab. "Zoe, what are you doing here?"

"Aunt Lexi brought me to see Dad… I figured since you weren't at the bunker last night I'd come in and check on you too," she explained, and he had a feeling the explanation had been very well rehearsed.

"I see."

"So why didn't you come home last night?" Zoe asked, folding her arms.

Stark frowned. He didn't want to hurt Zoe, but he knew at some point it'd be unavoidable. "I felt it would be better if I didn't."

"Just yesterday you were telling me that you cared about my Dad. I watched you when we found him… I know you care about him-"

"He doesn't care about me, Zo. Before I disappeared we weren't even friends. We were rivals. We couldn't even stand each other," he interrupted. He didn't want to hear it… couldn't listen to her talk about Jack having feelings for Nathan when he knew they didn't exist. It was too painful.

"I watched him go through hell after we thought you were dead! How can you even say that, Nathan?! If he didn't care why is it I stayed up half the night rocking my Father to sleep the night before you came back? I know he loves you! I would bet my life on it! And I know you love him back! You can't just walk away from this!" Zoe snapped angrily, her hands on her hips.

Nathan shook his head, standing up and walking over to Zoe. "I'm sorry, Zoe, but it's better this way. I was a fool to even think it could ever have worked out between your father and me," he whispered.

"Will you just talk to him first before you completely give up?! Whatever he said-"

"Zoe, I can't. I have work to do," he told her, kissing her cheek before he moved past her, leaving the room. He refused to turn back, for fear of what he'd see. He knew he'd upset Zoe, which was the last thing he wanted to do. There was no avoiding it though. Maybe one day she'd understand… maybe.

* * *

It was late, almost two in the morning when Nathan found himself walking the empty halls of GD right into Jack Carter's room. Carter was asleep in the infirmary, still under watch per Allison's orders. Stark walked inside the room, quietly shutting the door behind him before he took a seat next to Jack's bed. He watched the Sheriff sleep, so peaceful, thinking of everything that had happened since he'd come back. It had taken him all of thirty seconds to realize Zoe was right before, how could all those little moments have happened unless Jack cared? Unless he felt something? He had to be missing something!

He remembered how Jack had helped him in the moments after he'd reached consciousness, completely lost and terrified. When he hadn't even known his own name, Carter had been there. Jack had held him, kept him sane, protected him, and comforted him. At the time Nathan hadn't even known who to trust, but he'd clung to Jack from the very moment he'd been pulled into the other man's arms… and Jack had clung to him right back. In those few moments it had felt like they were keeping each other solid, as if they were to let go they'd melt into the ground… broken. Jack Carter had been his lifeline… his touch had grounded Nathan the way nothing else could. He'd seen the way Jack looked at him, and it wasn't dislike or hate that he'd seen in Jack's eyes. He'd seen love. At the time he hadn't understood it, but Stark knew… he knew with all his heart that he'd seen love in the other man's eyes. He'd stroked Nathan's back, told him everything would be okay, and Nathan had believed him. He'd known it was true. He'd never felt so safe in his life, and doubted he'd ever feel so again.

No, something else was going on… something Jack refused to talk about. Nathan knew he would have to be patient. In time he would understand what had brought on Jack's change of heart. Although he couldn't help but wonder, he forced himself to think positive. Zoe had believed it, so why wasn't that alone enough? Nathan stood, standing over Jack as he stroked the other man's face, his fingertips tracing the lines… signs of growing older. With a smile he repeated the words that ran through his head over and over again. "See you around, Jack," he whispered and with a gentle kiss to Jack's forehead he left.

* * *

**_Three Days Later_**

"**It's good to have you back, Sheriff Carter,**" spoke S.A.R.A.H. making Jack smile.

"It's good to be home," he spoke with a small smile, walking through the door. He was still in a bit of pain thanks to the ribs, but those would soon heal in time. Being stuck in the infirmary had been quite difficult, especially with Zoe barely speaking to him. Although his daughter seemed bent on making sure he was okay, it was obvious she was mad at him, and it didn't take much to realize it had to do with Nathan. He hadn't seen Stark since their last conversation days before after the scientist had found him bloody and bruised and trapped under a car.

"Are you sure you don't need anything else?" a voice questioned from behind him.

Jack turned back around. "Thanks Allison, but I'm fine. You've already given me a ride home, that's enough," he assured her. With a cautious breath he looked away. "How's Nathan?" he asked. It hurt to even say the other man's name, but he couldn't just forget about him.

Allison frowned. "How should I know? I've barely seen him these past few days."

Carter frowned, confused. "I… Zoe said he hasn't been staying at the bunker, I assumed… he was staying with you."

Allison shook her head. "Who? Nathan the workaholic? From what Henry's told me he's barely left his lab for the last three days. I've tried to talk to him about going home and getting some rest but you know how stubborn he can be. Maybe now that your back he'll actually get some rest. He's been spending most of the night looking after you while you sleep, and every day working on his 'Retriever'."

Carter wasn't sure what to think. He'd watched Nathan give her the necklace… she was wearing the damned thing! He'd watched him kiss her. It didn't make any sense. Why would he be looking after Carter at night when it was obvious he'd already made his choice?

"Are you sure you don't need anything else?" Allison asked for the hundredth time.

Jack shook his head. "Um no… I'm fine. Thanks Allison," he whispered, looking back at her, his voice suddenly feeling raw.

Allison smiled before turning around and leaving with a wave.

Jack watched her go, unable to wrap his mind around what Allison had told him. It didn't make any sense. Sure, the kiss had been brief, barely worth mentioning, but it'd been enough. To Jack it had been a clear sign that Nathan wanted to continue where he'd left off… either that or it'd been one finally goodbye to the woman he'd once been married to. If he and Allison hadn't rekindled their relationship… that had to mean… Jack groaned. "Oh crap!" He really, really needed to talk to Nathan!

To Be Continued


	9. Chapter 9

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: Sorry this took so long! This chapter was a toughie!

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Nine

"How's Jack?" Nathan asked, cutting his salmon with his fork before taking a bite. He wasn't a bit fan of GD cuisine, but it served its purpose. Normally he enjoyed eating at Café Diem, but there were far too many distractions there, and Stark wanted to focus on his project. With Thorne coming back in a few days to check on his progress, he needed to be ready. She'd supported him so far, but if the cost became too great there was a chance she'd pull out, and he would lose his only chance of regaining his lost memories.

"Is that all you're going to ask me? How's Jack? Nathan, if you want to know so badly, go visit him. I just took him home yesterday, and until he's fully recovered he can't return to work. I'll even drive you myself," she urged.

Nathan frowned. "I appreciate what your doing Allison, but I'm not quite ready for that conversation. It's complicated. Just tell me, has he been resting at all?"

Allison sighed, probably frustrated with his stubbornness. Stark wanted to clear the air between them more than anything in the world, but he knew in Jack's condition it would be better if he'd fully healed first. He was stressed enough as it was, he didn't need Stark adding on anything more. "Zoe doesn't believe so. She thinks something's bothering him. He's been having nightmares."

Nathan ran a hand through his hair. He had a feeling he knew what Carter's nightmares were about. "Haven't we all?" he mumbled to himself.

Unfortunately Allison heard his comment. "Have you been sleeping at all, Nathan?"

"Not really, no. Then again the couches at GD aren't exactly top of the line. You'd think in a town this advanced they'd have the decency to get more comfortable couches."

Allison took a sip of her water, shooting him an annoyed glare. "At least at Carter's place you had a bed."

"That is true."

"Both Henry and I have offered to let you stay with us. You turned us both down," she reminded him.

Nathan shrugged. "I simply stated that the couches were poorly designed, that doesn't mean I need to be taken care of… by any of you. There was a time when I was the director of GD! I have PhDs and apparently a Nobel Prize. I don't need to be treated like a child."

"Do you even remember what it was like to be a child?" she shot back. It was a cheap shot, and she knew it. She was obviously frustrated, but he wasn't in the mood for their banter.

Nathan glared right back at her. "Do you? I mean it was so long ago…."

Allison sat back in her chair, folding her arms. "Now that was just cruel."

"Ditto," he said, taking another bite of his salmon. It was a little dry, but he forced it down anyway. As he looked into her eyes he could see she was upset, and immediately put down his fork. "I'm fine, Allison."

"Henry and I are just worried you're pushing yourself too far this time. We just got you back, Nathan!" Allison fought.

Stark paused, finally realizing why she was so worried. He knew they were still a little foggy on how he'd managed to return from the grave. Although he suspected it had to do with Kevin Blake, he wasn't quite sure why. His dreams had often surrounded the boy, as if his mind was trying to tell him some secret kept hidden in his subconscious. "I'm not going anywhere," he whispered to her, his gaze steady as he looked into her eyes. "I promise."

Allison looked back at him, hesitating before she finally seemed to accept his words. "Okay… you win. Just be careful."

Nathan smiled, going back to his dry salmon. "I will," he assured her.

* * *

**_Five Days Later_**

Sheriff Jack Carter was back in action and ready to work thanks to advanced health care, a rather nice perk for working in Eureka. He'd been sure if he stayed home much longer he'd go out of his mind. Having his house for company wasn't exactly his idea of fun, and since Zoe was still angry with him he hadn't seen much of her unless he needed her for something. It was good to be back to work, even if he found himself standing off to the side next to Fargo as he watched Nathan Stark, Henry Deacon, and Allison Blake fill Eva Thorne in on GD happenings. There hadn't been much to happen in her absence, or his for that matter, except for a few minor issues that Jo had handled wonderfully… but most of those had been domestic disputes. "And what of the 'Retriever?' You're report states that you started human trials four days ago thanks to DOD approval," said Thorne.

Nathan looked up from his notepad. Jack knew he hadn't been paying much attention to the meeting, especially when he'd realized the notepad was filled with drawings rather than notes. He couldn't really see the drawing, but he had been paying close attention to Nathan through out the meeting, as it was the first time he'd seen the other man in days. He looked thin and tired. "There was a slight power disruption in the first test, which has since been corrected."

"Any risk of brain damage? Before you started trials you'd mentioned it was a possibility."

Henry shook his head. "It's already been corrected. Minimal risk."

Jack noticed Henry give Nathan a brief glance, and Nathan cleared his throat, suddenly looking rather uncomfortable. Carter frowned when he watched Stark glance back at him for a moment. "In three out of five trials there were problems of memory loss… mostly short term memory, but in one case it affected long term as well. In that special case the subject lost over a month."

Thorne frowned, not looking very pleased with the results. Jack didn't blame her. He hadn't been told anything new about the project since his accident. A month? And Nathan wanted to use this device? "I don't understand… a device that retrieves memories also erases them?" Thorne questioned with a raised eyebrow. It seemed Jack wasn't the only one that saw the irony.

"We're still unsure as to why the memories are lost in the process. We've been trying to fix the problem, but it seems to be an effect, or perhaps a byproduct of the device itself. Memories are unlocked, but the more recent memories are lost in the shuffle. It is possible they will resurface in time, but there is also a chance they man never be recovered," Henry explained calmly. "We still have a lot of data to go over from our latest test. It may take us time to truly understand where the problem lies. We want to have a full report ready for your desk by the end of the week."

Jack stared at Nathan who refused to meet his gaze. He wasn't really surprised. "Okay… excellent. Doctors Stark and Deacon, you have a go to continue your tests. The DOD have given you permission to proceed."

"Thank you Ms. Thorne," said Stark.

Eva nodded. "Thank you Doctors. You may go."

Allison and Henry left the office almost immediately. Deacon gave Jack a pat on the shoulder before he left. Fargo was the next to leave the office. Finally Nathan walked over to him while Thorne began going through the paperwork Allison had left for her to catch up on. "Can we talk?" Nathan asked in a whisper, finally meeting Jack's gaze. Green met blue and Jack knew it was important, and had more to do than their recent issues.

Jack folded his arms. "Okay," he whispered back, not sure he was going to like what Stark had to say.

* * *

The moment Nathan shut his office door he turned to look at Jack who was sitting on his desk. "I'm going to go through with it, Jack," Nathan told him. "I have to. There's still a chance I'll keep my recent memories."

"There's always a chance," Jack muttered, rolling his eyes in annoyance.

Nathan took a step toward Carter. "Jack, I don't remember my own parents. I don't know if I had brothers or sisters. I don't know who I am."

"You're Doctor Nathan Stark. You have a million PhDs, and a Nobel Prize. You have an ego the size of the Texas, and an IQ to match!" Jack shot back, his frustration bleeding through.

"I don't remember who Nathan Stark is, Carter! I don't remember that man with the PhDs or the giant ego! I don't remember him! In fact, the only thing I do seem to remember is you, damn it!" Nathan shouted.

Jack looked away, but Nathan wasn't about to let him off that easy it seemed. He laid a hand on Carter's cheek, forcing him to look at Stark.

"I remember you. If I can remember you once, I can remember you again."

Jack sighed, scratching the back of his neck. "I'm sorry about what I said. I was upset," he finally spoke. He'd been feeling guilty about what he'd said to Nathan since speaking to Allison. Although he still didn't know the situation, he had a good feeling things had not been what they seemed.

"Because I didn't tell you about the 'Retriever?'" Nathan asked.

Carter shook his head, looking into Stark's pleading eyes. He needed to tell him, to face his fears and lay everything out on the table. "I saw you in Thorne's office."

"What?"

"I saw you kiss Allison. I thought… I thought you'd made your choice," he confessed.

Nathan frowned. "That's why you ran off? Jack you almost got yourself killed over a meaningless kiss?!"

"It didn't look all that meaningless to me!" Carter defended.

Stark took another step, invading Jack's space. "Well you were right, Jack! I have made my choice, but it's not Allison! That kiss was my way of saying goodbye! I'd hurt her and I didn't want to ruin our relationship! I do love her, but after everything that's happened I'd think it'd been painfully obvious that it's not Allison I want!" He was shouting, but Jack wasn't ready to back down just yet.

"Then what do you want, Nathan?! Because I don't know anymore!" he shouted in return.

"Damn it, Jack! I want you!" Nathan finally told him.

It was at that moment that time seemed to stand still. Jack was looking back at Nathan, finally noticing just how close he was. Both seemed to realize it at the same time and before another word could be spoken their lips met. Jack wasn't really sure who had kissed who, but as he felt Nathan's lips against his own for the first time he realized it didn't really matter. He wasted no time wrapping his arms around Nathan's neck, pulling him closer as he deepened the kiss. The world fell away until it was only them, and suddenly all the pain, all the dark times, all the anger fell away. They were holding onto each other as if they would fall if they let go, as if they were hanging and only by holding on would they survive. Nathan kissed him back roughly, the scruff of his beard rubbing against Jack's skin. It felt damn good. Unfortunately reality soon crashed against him, leaving him cold, and Carter was forced to realize there was one problem they'd yet to really discuss. One problem he knew he couldn't live with. "Wait… wait… I can't."

Nathan frowned. "I don't understand… I thought-"

"No Nathan… I do want to. Believe me, I do, but I can't do this. In less than a week you're going to use that device to recover your memories and all this will be forgotten. You won't remember this kiss, you won't remember your goodbye to Allison, and you won't remember choosing me instead."

Stark immediately shook his head. "That's not true! I told you… I remembered you once!"

"There's no guarantee you'll remember any of this ever happened, Nathan. I understand why you feel you need to put your head in that thing, believe me I do, but I can't do this when in a few days it could all be erased from your mind. I'm sorry… I just can't," Jack told him, pushing off the desk. He immediately backed away from Nathan and toward the door. "There's still a chance your memories could return on your own. You aren't choosing me, Nathan… your choosing that machine."

"Jack-"

He couldn't kiss Nathan, not when it was possible Nathan would forget everything… maybe even go back to Allison without knowing the choice he'd made. In the end it would only hurt more. Jack knew he wouldn't be able to withstand that, especially considering his actions after having seen Stark and Allison kiss. "I need to go now, Nathan. I'm sorry," he whispered and opened Nathan's door, leaving the office before he did something stupid. Every bone in his body wanted nothing more than to forget about the future and take Nathan any way he could, but Jack knew it would be a bad idea. His gut was telling him he needed to leave, and Jack Carter always trusted his gut… even if he could feel his heart breaking with each step he took.

To Be Continued


	10. Chapter 10

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: I gave you a long one to make up for how long this chapter took! Had a bit of a brain freeze for a moment! Sorry about that! Thankfully that's over, so enjoy! :D

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Ten

"He just left?" Henry asked, leaning back in his chair as he stared at Nathan in surprise.

Nathan ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "He just left. He believes I'll forget about this past month… probably expects me to go back to Allison after I've used the device to retrieve my lost memories."

"Well, Nathan… that is a possibility. Chances are you will lose your most recent memories… which may go back as far as your return amongst the living. You can't really blame him. You'd be in a relationship for what? A week? Then you use the 'Retriever' and forget you ever even cared about him."

Stark shook his head. He knew everyone believed he'd lose his recent memories when he used the device, but he wouldn't forget Jack. He couldn't. "Henry, I can't remember my own parents, but I look at Jack and I remember conversations, looks… everything. Besides, there's still a chance I won't even be affected."

"Nathan, the more memory it recovers the more likely there will be short term memory loss. You know that. Besides, you say you remember Jack, but what makes you think the reverse isn't possible? You can't always have it both ways. Sometimes life doesn't give you an easy way out. The fact is, you need to make a choice," Henry told him gently.

Nathan looked away, staring at the device he and Henry had built together. "This is too important to me, Henry… I can't just turn my back on it now. I can't just ignore the fact that I don't know who the hell I am!" Stark fought angrily, standing up and walking over to his creation.

"You lost your memories, you didn't change identities! You don't need to know your past to know who you are. Stop pretending that's why you want to use this device!" Henry almost shouted.

Nathan froze, turning back around in surprise. "Exactly what are you trying to say here, Henry?"

Henry paused, pinching his nose for a minute as he let out a sigh, obviously trying to gain back control. Nathan waited patiently for him to open his eyes and explain. "You've been claiming the main reason why you want to access your lost memories is because you feel you don't know who you are, but the fact is this is about fear… your fears. It's the final test." Slowly the older man stood and walked over to Nathan, meeting Stark's eyes. He wasn't about to back down. "Before any of this happened you proposed to Allison. You were going to marry her, Nathan. Then suddenly on your wedding day the universe is ready to unravel and you sacrifice yourself to save Eureka. Then suddenly months later your back, only you have no memory of anyone around you except for Jack. You wouldn't even talk to Allison or myself. So what do we do? We have Carter take care of you. You start remembering more and more about yourself, and almost every memory seems to center around Jack, so you think to yourself that maybe there's a connection. Maybe you felt something for him that you just couldn't admit to before."

"I remember our interactions, Henry. I remember how terrified I'd feel every time Jack was almost killed. I didn't want anyone to know it, but I always cared about him," Nathan fought.

"And before you also cared about Allison. Nathan, it's like you've been split in half… the old Doctor Stark who loved Allison, and the new Nathan who loves Jack. You don't know the old Doctor Stark like you think you should and you feel that until you have all of your memories back you'll never know for sure if you've made the right choice."

Nathan frowned, turning to look at the device. Was it possible? He knew he'd made his choice, but it was true he still knew a small bit about his relationship with Allison. What if he really was making a mistake? How could he truly make a decision without all the information? He wanted Jack, but if he'd never made the sacrifice he made he'd be married to Allison. "What should I do?" he whispered finally, realizing Henry was right.

"I can't tell you that. You're the one that's gotta live with your decision. Either way someone gets hurt. The question is… do you go on with the final test and prove to yourself that you're not making a mistake? Or do you let go and accept what you know you can have with Jack?"

"What would you do? If you were me?" Nathan asked him.

Henry smiled sadly, looking down at the device. "If I were you… I'd want to know. I'd need to know if the feelings would still be there," Henry answered him honestly. "Just be careful, Nathan. Make a choice and stick with it… or you'll lose them both and the decision will be made for you," Henry warned him before resting a hand on Stark's shoulder for a brief moment. The older man left the office a moment later to give Nathan time to process what he'd said. Suddenly Nathan could feel a serious headache coming on….

* * *

He'd made his choice. It would hurt, Jack, but Nathan knew in his gut that it was the right one. He needed to know his past, needed to have his life back. In two days he'd be hooked up to his own creation and his memories would be returned to him, but he wasn't ready to lose Carter in the process. Nathan set up the camera, making sure it was in position before he took a seat at his desk. He grabbed the remote and hit the 'record' button, staring into the camera. "I know you must be confused… hell, I'm you… of course you're confused. About three months ago I awoke with no memory of my life. Over these past few months I've only been able to retrieve bits and pieces of my memories… so I created a device, the 'Retriever.' If it worked you now have all of your memories returned to you. Unfortunately the affects of this device may likely wipe your short term memory, and leave you back where you started. I've decided to make this video to inform you of just what's happened since I returned from the dead… since you returned from the dead. What you choose to do with this information will be up to you… us, but you need to know all the facts, because I know you love Allison Blake… but I also know you love Jack Carter…."

* * *

"Are you crazy?! I mean seriously, are you clinically insane?! How could you get so close and throw it all away like that?!" exclaimed Jo, her frustration evident.

Jack would have laughed if not for the crap mood he was in. "What was I going to do? Kiss with him? Sleep with him? Then cross my fingers that when he gets out of that machine he'd remember?"

"YES!"

Carter rolled his eyes. "Please Jo; you wouldn't have been able to do it anymore than me. If it were you and Zane you'd have stopped it too."

Jo shook her head fiercely. When she saw the disbelief on his face she sighed and walked over to him, turning his chair to face her. "Carter… one way or another, things will change. There are two possibilities in this situation. Either he uses the machine, remembers his life and you, or he remembers his life and doesn't remember what happened between you two. Either way, there's only one possible option."

"And that would be?" he asked, folding his arms.

Lupo glared at him. "You stop trying to protect yourself from getting hurt and you take a chance! Stop playing it safe! Put your heart on the line and if it gets broken you suck it up and deal with it, knowing that the people who care about you will be there to put it back together again! This is the man you love, Carter. You don't walk away from that. If this is all you have… how would you rather spend it? Alone in bed, or in his arms?"

Jack frowned, not quite sure what to say. He knew he'd walked away because he hadn't wanted to get hurt, wasn't sure if he could handle that after everything that had happened. Could he live with being with Nathan only to watch him go back to Allison after? Could he really handle that? But Jo made a good point too. If this was all he had, just a day… did he really want to waste that, living with regret that he'd never known what it felt like to be with Nathan? "You know… you've seriously gone soft, Jo," he finally said with a faint smile.

Lupo smiled back. "I haven't gone soft, believe me. I can still kick your ass just as well as I ever could… which I will if you don't march back to Nathan and say your goodbye the proper way… with a giant bed and no clothes on. And by the way, it's called being a romantic!"

Carter groaned. "Oh Jo! Seriously… uncalled for!"

"Carter, this is your last chance. Don't waste the time you have left because you're afraid of getting hurt. You're already hurt," she whispered, her smile fading just a bit.

Jack knew she was right… he was hurt. It just seemed so ironic somehow. He finally had Nathan, in fact the man had literally confessed his affections for Jack, and he'd walked away. He never could catch a break. He'd thought it was bad enough being almost forty and divorced after fifteen years of marriage. Now to add on to his screwed up love life, he'd fallen for a man who was about to erase everything they'd shared in the last few months in order to get his life back. He could write a book.

* * *

When he opened the laboratory door he could see Nathan sitting on his desk across from the device. He was so lost in thought; Jack realized he hadn't even heard the door open. The Sheriff watched from the door for a moment, taking in the dark circles under Nathan's eyes that spoke of stress and lack of sleep. He knew he hadn't been leaving GD, spending sleepless nights on his couch rather than go back to the bunker after everything that had happened, and the imagine of Stark looking so hopeless pulled at his heart. Jack knew the choice he was about to make would be the hardest choice he'd made in a very long time. His instinct was to protect himself, to protect his heart from punishment at all costs, yet here he was at Nathan Stark's door… asking for more. He never should have let Jo talk him into going. He knew there was no turning back… he'd made his choice and he couldn't walk away. No matter how hard it was… he wanted to be with Nathan… even if it was just for one last night. "Big day tomorrow," he spoke, taking a few more steps into the office, closing the door behind him.

Nathan jumped immediately, his head snapped in surprise, his green eyes wide. "Jack? What are you-"

Jack took a few more steps into the room, taking a seat on the desk beside Nathan. "I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, Nathan. And whether you realize it or not, neither do you. I just didn't want to spend the last night we have left… alone," he admitted, hesitating for a moment before he linked his hand in Stark's.

Nathan stared down at him, a small smile growing on his lips. "That's not how I want to spend my last night either."

Carter shook his head, looking away. "I walked away from you because I was afraid of getting hurt. I still am, but I'd rather have a broken heart than live the rest of my life full of regrets. I want to be there for you, Nathan."

Stark pushed off the desk, letting go of Jack's hand as he turned to face him. "You think you're the only one in this Jack? The only one who's scared? I don't want to lose you, Jack… and I sure as hell don't want to lose the last three months we spent together. I don't remember much of my life, but I do know I've felt more… lived more these last few months than I have my entire life! I lived a closed off life, closed off from everyone and because of that they feared me. Allison was just another part of the plan. In the end my life came down to math equations and compatibility tests. You Jack… you were never a part of the plan!"

Carter wasn't really sure what to say, so he didn't bother trying. Instead, he pulled Nathan to him, closed his eyes, and kissed him with everything he had left to give. He shut his eyes tight, pushing away thoughts of the future or the past. For once in his life he held onto the moment, refusing to let it go. Nathan melted into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Jack tight, pulling them closer together. Tongues fought for domination, their bodies flush against each other. Jack let himself lose track of time, letting go. His heart was beating faster and faster, the voice in the back of his mind screaming for him to stop… to leave before he just made things worse. He didn't let go of Nathan, refused to let go. He told the voice to 'fuck off' for the first time in his life and kissed the man he loved that much harder. There was no tomorrow. There was no damned device. There was only one moment in time. There was only him… and Nathan. Nothing else existed. Nothing else mattered. He wasn't letting go this time. Not tonight.

* * *

He opened his eyes slowly, registering the body surrounding him, holding him. He didn't want to leave, didn't want to move. He wanted to stay in Nathan's arms forever… but he knew that was impossible. He didn't regret what had happened between them, but he couldn't help the silent tears so close to falling as he realized they couldn't escape reality. They would eventually have to face the world again, and soon everything would be back to the start. Time would be reset, and his time with Nathan would be erased for good. He wasn't sure how he'd cope. He wasn't even sure he could take watching the man he loved willingly let go of everything they'd had together. He'd already lost Nathan once… and now he was going to lose him again.

Nathan shifted in his sleep, tightening his hold on Jack. Slowly the Sheriff turned in Stark's arms to face the scientist, resting his forehead against Nathan's, trying to memorize the last moments he had left before it would all be taken away from him. "I love you, Nathan," he whispered, knowing Stark couldn't hear him. "I always have, and I always will."

* * *

"Hey, you ready?" Henry Deacon asked, resting a comforting hand on Nathan's shoulder.

Nathan stared at the device, feeling his heart beat a mile a minute. He forced himself to nod in the affirmative. He couldn't stop thinking about the night he'd spent with Jack, how it'd felt to be intimate with the man he loved. He didn't want to forget that night. He didn't want to forget Jack Carter. "I need a moment."

Henry smiled sadly, turning to look past Nathan for a second, and Stark could sense the person Henry was staring at, knew instinctually that it was Jack. "Take all the time you want," Deacon assured him, walking past Stark and out the door to wait with Allison, Zoe, and Fargo.

Nathan took a deep breath, preparing himself to turn around and face Jack, when the Sheriff instead walked past him, walking over to the machine. His fingers grazed lightly over the metal. "You know… I remember the first time I met you. I just knew you'd turn out to be a pompous jackass. Our second conversation confirmed it. I'd never met such a cocky bastard. You were the type of guy that just knew he was Superman, and damn the world for thinking otherwise. The funny thing is… when I'd thought you'd died… I realized the reason it'd shocked me so much was because… to me, you were Superman," Jack admitted.

Nathan didn't move, just continued to stare.

"You've saved my life so many times with that damn brain of yours. Allison always said we made a great team. We fought constantly, but we always got the job done when it mattered."

Finally Stark walked over to Jack, wrapping his arms around the smaller man from behind. "I'm not Superman, Jack. I'm not invincible."

Jack shrugged. "Even Superman had kryptonite. A lot of people thought I was jealous because I wanted to be you… but the truth was I just wanted to be _with_ you."

Nathan chuckled. "Does that make you Lois Lane?"

Carter relaxed against him. "I guess it does… though I'm not sure how I feel about being compared to a woman."

"What are you trying to say, Jack?" Nathan finally asked.

Jack sighed, pausing for a moment, obviously trying to get his thoughts together. "I understand why you need to do this, Nathan. You'll never be that pompous jackass I fell for the day we met until you get hooked up to that machine. And even if you do wake up with no memory of what we shared together these past few months… it's okay, I can live with that. The world needs Superman." Jack smiled for a moment, his eyes focused on the 'Retriever.' "Either way, not even you know what's going to happen. You fell for me once… who's to say lightening can't strike the same place twice."

Nathan smiled, kissing Jack's temple. "Nothing's impossible," he assured him, thinking of the recording he'd left on his desk in his office.

"Nathan?" came another voice, and both men turned around, moving away from each other as they saw Henry at the door, holding it open. "It's time."

Stark took in a deep breath and looked at Jack one last time. "It's time," he whispered to the man.

Jack nodded in return, and then turned to look at Henry. "He's ready."

* * *

Doctor Nathan Stark, Nobel prize-winning mathematician awoke for the first time, grunting from the ache in his head. "Nathan?" The voice sounded so familiar… a woman's voice. He knew that voice. Slowly his memories returned, seeping in like a river into his consciousness, until finally it poured in like a waterfall and he was hit with a million images, smells, sounds, tastes, and experiences. The shock left him breathless as his eyes opened wide and he gasped. "Nathan?!"

Stark looked around the room, a little panicked at first before his eyes settled on Allison Blake. "Ally?"

Allison smiled in relief. "You were out for almost three hours. We were starting to get worried."

"Wha… what happened?" he asked, realizing he was currently in the infirmary.

"What's the last thing you remember?" she asked.

Stark hesitated for a moment, a little overwhelmed by the memories. He closed his eyes and sifted through the inconsequential memories to retrieve the one he was looking for. Once it was found he opened his eyes and turned back to look at Allison. "It was our wedding day, but something went wrong. Time… was being looped and only Carter knew what was happening. He needed my help to fix it. I… sacrificed myself to make sure the flow of time returned to normal before everything and everyone could be deleted." He felt like there was more, something he was forgetting that was just out of reach, but then shook his head, confused. "I should be dead."

Allison's smile slowly faded as she turned from Stark and looked at someone standing at the door… Carter. Nathan followed Allison's gaze and watched as the Sheriff stood by the door for a moment before turning around and walking away. Allison cleared her throat and turned back to look at Nathan. "We thought you were… until three months ago."

"Three months ago?" He didn't understand, still disoriented. His memories were scattered, not quite in order yet and it was hard to focus.

Allison nodded. "You were found three months ago in a clearing… by Sheriff Carter, with no memory of yourself or anyone else, except for Carter…."

To Be Continued


	11. Chapter 11

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: The story's getting closer and closer to the end! Just a few more chapters left! :gasp: I can't believe it's almost over! Thanks for all your reviews so far! Keep em coming!

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Eleven

After extensive testing Doctor Nathan Stark was finally a free man, and he'd never felt better… even if he did have a feeling people were keeping something from him. Allison had only told him a few details about the three months after his reappearance, including his brief time living with Sheriff Carter (which had been disturbing enough) and his work with Henry on the 'Retriever.' Henry had been just as cryptic, avoiding all discussion of Sheriff Carter or what Nathan had been like with no memories of his former life. He'd even been desperate enough to ask Fargo, only to be attacked with a hug the moment he said his name. The young man had then gone on for a half an hour babbling about three months of Stark calling him 'Farger' and everything else BUT his name.

Obviously something had changed between him and the Sheriff. Stark had spent three days stuck in the infirmary for observation and each night Carter had come to visit at a time when he'd believed the scientist was asleep. Nathan hadn't been all that interested in conversation and had allowed him to believe he was asleep. Even Zoe had come to visit him on the third day, but only for a few minutes to see how he was doing. He'd tried his best to remember something about the last three months, but only managed to pull up a few brief flashes. Nathan remembered each one, like puzzles that needed to be put together. Most of the flashes were of Jack Carter. He felt like the answer was just out of reach, and it was hard not to get frustrated with his lack of progress.

Allison had become a puzzle herself. He'd noticed not long after her explanation of why he'd awoken to the infirmary that she was wearing the diamond necklace he'd planned on giving her as a wedding present. She'd explained that he'd given it to her not long ago. The problem was, although she had the present, she was no longer wearing the engagement ring he'd bought her, nor did she seem comfortable with his affection. In fact, she'd been extremely distant, usually only visiting him in the infirmary when she had Kevin with her. Their last visit hadn't gone well at all as he'd gotten sick of her behavior and finally decided to call her on it. In the end she'd avoided the whole conversation, choosing to run away from the issue rather than face it. The look she'd given him before walking out the door… he'd seen it only once before, the day he'd packed his bags and moved to Washington DC knowing full well that their marriage was falling apart. This time they hadn't even made it to the ceremony. He was missing something… some piece of the puzzle and he needed answers.

* * *

It was late when Stark walked into Café Diem, surprised the place was almost empty except for the lone Sheriff sipping his coffee with a half eaten plate of food before him. Nathan walked slowly over to the man, taking a seat nearby. Carter glanced over at him. "So they finally released you, I see."

"Very astute, Carter… I knew you were once a US Marshall, but you never told me you were a detective as well," Nathan spoke, reverting to old habits. He needed normalcy after everything he'd been through, and fighting with Sheriff Carter seemed like just the thing.

Jack chuckled at the snide remark, surprising Nathan. "That's me, Jack Carter-Sherlock. I just go by Jack Carter now… for time's sake."

Stark rolled his eyes. "What are you doing here so late?"

Carter shrugged, taking another sip of his coffee. "Zoe's busy in the back cleaning up, so I figured I'd wait… take her home. You?"

"Well, seeing as this establishment normally serves food, I thought I'd grab dinner before heading in," he spoke, purposely trying to provoke the man. He knew he was pressing all the usual buttons, but it seemed the Sheriff had no interest in sparing with him.

Jack looked down at his own plate. "Want my fries?"

Nathan wrinkled his nose in disgust. "I think I'll pass," he said; Stark had never been very fond of greasy foods… especially fries.

Carter just shrugged. "You're loss."

It was then that Vincent finally opened the door. "Doctor Stark! I didn't realize you'd come in. What can I do for you?"

"The chef's special… please," Stark requested; making the other man light up with joy.

Jack snickered. "He says please," he mumbled to himself.

"Of course I say please, the only person I'm purposely rude to is you, Sheriff," Nathan shot back, having heard his remark.

The Sheriff's smile only grew. "Ah Stark, you always know just what to say to make a guy feel special."

Nathan frowned, thrown off balance by Carter's words. Was it just him, or was the Sheriff actually flirting with him? Stark opened his mouth to speak when the door opened once more and Zoe walked into the room. "I'm ready, Dad," she announced.

"Great," said Jack as he got up, grabbing one last French fry before he got up from the stool. The Sheriff turned to look at Stark, his smile fading for just a second and Nathan couldn't quite get over the intense look in the other man's eyes. "I never thought I'd say this but… it's good to have you back, Nathan," Jack told him before turning away and walking with his daughter out of Café Diem, leaving a very puzzled scientist behind.

Nathan turned to look at Vince, who immediately cleared his throat and straightened awkwardly. "I'll go… um… work on your food," he spoke and left in a hurry. Stark's frown deepened.

* * *

Zoe frowned, staring at her father as he drove them home in silence. To everyone else he looked normal enough, the emotional strain he'd gone through barely registered on his face, but she knew better. She knew her father was barely hanging on. She wanted to be mad at Nathan for going forward with the procedure, but she couldn't really blame him for wanting his life back. She knew Nathan had truly cared about her father… maybe even loved him. "Dad?"

Jack glanced at her for a moment, a faint smile on his lips. Zoe knew it was his way of reassuring her that he was fine, that everything was normal. She saw through it. "Yeah sweetie?"

Zoe bit her lip for a moment. "You know I love you right?"

His smile grew upon hearing the words, a genuine smile. "I know… I love you too."

She just wanted her father to be happy. She knew the divorce had been hard on him, and she worried… worried he'd be alone for the rest of his life. No one should have to be alone. He'd had a chance at true love with Nathan before it'd been ripped from under him, and she felt helpless. While Nathan had been in the infirmary she'd resisted visiting at first, until finally she'd forced herself to go… if only to see if there was any chance that he might remember something. She still wasn't sure if he'd ever remember those three months, but she didn't want to lose hope.

"Look Zoe, I know you're worried about me." Zoe started to shake her head when her father shot her a look and she immediately paused, knowing it was useless to lie. "I'm not going to lie and say I'm fine… the truth is I'm not. I'm dealing with it the best way I can, but it's never easy to know that the man you spent three months falling for doesn't even remember what happened. I just want you to know you don't have to worry, because as hard as this is for me, I know I'm not going through it alone. I have you, Lex, Jo, Henry… I'm going to be okay."

Zoe smiled, linking her father's hand in hers for a moment, feeling closer to her father than ever before. She knew they had their rough times, but she was glad their relationship was as strong as it was. "Okay."

Her father glanced at her once more, and she saw both the pain and the pride in his eyes. "Okay," he whispered.

* * *

After a very long session with Doctor Quinn to assess if he was ready to return to work he'd been cleared, and Thorne hadn't bothered to ease him back into the job. Allison had just been happy to have someone to share the work load with again, and had taken perverse pleasure in watching Thorne pile files after files for him to go through. Although it was still unclear exactly where his relationship with Allison lied, he'd been relieved to see her relax enough to tease him about his 'tower' of files. Henry had come by to check on him periodically during the day, which had certainly helped his moral after spending hours and hours reading files dating back to when he's supposedly been dead. Some scientists had even gone so far as try and continue his work, but most of those projects were abandoned when it seemed the work was a little over their heads, something which pleased Stark to no end.

Nathan sighed, staring down at the never ending pile of files, pushing a few aside as he saw the thumb drive sitting on his desk, with a note attached in his own handwriting that simply read, 'Watch me.' He'd been debating whether he should for most of the day. Henry had encouraged him to look at it, but Nathan wasn't quite sure he wanted to. More and more he'd come to get the feeling that something had changed drastically over the three months, especially in regards to his relationship with others. Zoe Carter somehow seemed relaxed and open around him. Fargo didn't seem to mind his yelling as long as he said his name right. His rocky relationship with Henry now seemed to be back on track. Allison seemed distant, yet content with the idea of being his friend. The biggest change seemed to come from Sheriff Jack Carter, who seemed to switch from being suspiciously playful to down right flirtatious. Stark still wasn't sure what to make of that.

Although curious about what could have gone on during the short amount of time that he'd lost his memory, his fears that what he would learn would only make things worse made him hesitate to learn the truth. He was conflicted, and the feeling was not pleasant in the least. "Tough day?"

Nathan looked up, surprised to see Zoe Carter standing at his office door, holding a Vinspresso in each hand. Stark raised an eyebrow, not sure what to make of the teenager in front of him. "Not one of my better days," he admitted. "What brings you by?"

Zoe shrugged, putting down on of the Vinspressos in front of him. "I thought you could use the boost and I just finished school an hour ago. No offense, Nathan, but you look beat."

He only remembered a handful of conversations he'd had with the young woman before him, but it seemed they'd had plenty more during the three months after he'd reappeared. Both Henry and Allison had told him about his brief stay at the Carter's bunker while he'd been in recovery. Apparently when he'd first appeared he hadn't even remembered his own name. He watched the younger Carter take a seat across from his desk and sip her own drink. "Here to check on me?" he finally asked.

Zoe simply smiled. "It's a hard habit to break. We spent almost every day together for the past three months. It's a little weird going cold turkey," she explained.

He supposed he could understand that. Zoe Carter was a unique young woman, and despite his issues with her father, he rather liked the Sheriff's daughter. She was extremely bright and resourceful compared to most her age and he had no doubt she would make an excellent scientist one day. "You say we spent a lot of time together… doing what exactly?" he asked, curious.

Zoe paused for a second. "Sometimes you'd help me on my homework… we'd talk… things like that. You helped me get an A in my psychology class, and my biology class. Why do you ask?"

"Just curious," he told her, taking a sip of the Vinspresso Zoe had bought for him. The warm liquid immediately warmed his bones. "I've been doing my best to piece together these last few months… everything seems so different now."

Zoe nodded. "That's because it is different. I mean, you were Stark, but… you weren't, you know?"

"I can see you're just as eloquent as your father," noted Nathan with a sigh.

Zoe laughed. "You smiled a lot more. Sometimes I think you were happier," she admitted, looking away awkwardly.

"Happier?"

Zoe's smile faded. "Okay, maybe not happier, but… more like… free to be happy. It's kinda hard to explain."

Nathan wasn't quite sure how to take her comment. He couldn't imagine being anyone but himself. He knew he could be distant sometimes, and maybe a little controlled. Without that control he suspected he would be a very different man. "What about your father? Henry claims we actually managed to get along, but I find the idea hard to believe."

Zoe's smile returned, though not as strong as it'd been before. "More like you find the idea hard to swallow," she corrected.

Stark smiled, seeing her point. "A very keen observation, Zoe Carter," he told her. It surprised him how natural it felt to talk to the young teen. She was so much like her father, but with a special intelligence he suspected could only have come from her mother.

Zoe snickered. "He was the only one you actually seemed to remember. You wouldn't even let Allison touch you the first few days. My Dad was the only one you felt you could trust. You remembered his name before your own. He was the one that eventually found you. That's why they decided it would be better if you stayed with us until you got your memory back," she explained.

Nathan was starting to regret his curiosity. He couldn't even imagine having absolutely no memory of the people he cared about… or even himself. He found it even more disturbing that he had somehow remembered Sheriff Carter. "Perhaps I shouldn't have asked."

The teen before him rolled her eyes. "You know, you can pretend you hate him all you want, but I'm not falling for it. Whether you like it or not, you don't hate him and you never will."

Stark cocked his head, regarding the young Carter for a second as he tried to figure out whether she was serious or not. "Is that so?"

"Yes it's so. He drives you absolutely crazy, sure, but you could never hate Jack Carter."

"We aren't exactly friends. In case you forgot, he's been interested in my ex-wife since the moment he met her," he pointed out.

Zoe shook her head. "That's called harmless flirting. You _assumed_ he had an interest in her."

Nathan took another sip of his Vinspresso, keeping his eyes focused on Zoe Carter. In the end he doubted it really mattered anymore the way Allison was acting around him. He didn't quite believe Carter carried no feelings for his ex-wife, but he was willing to think over the possibility. If it were true, he wondered how it would affect the dynamic between him and the Sheriff. In a way, their little competition had defined their relationship. They were bitter rivals… competitors. Still, he couldn't deny there was another part to their relationship that had nothing to do with Allison Blake… something mysterious, something he'd always refused to name. "I've seen the way he looks at her." He wasn't quite ready to believe that Carter didn't have at least some interest in Allison.

The young Carter looked into his eyes, never wavering. "Have you seen the way he looks at you?" she whispered, suddenly deadly serious.

Stark froze almost immediately, surprised by her words. He felt like a bucket of cold water had just been splashed in his face as a tiny shiver ran down his spine. "Excuse me?"

Zoe looked away, shaking her head. "Forget it." The young woman took a sip of her drink and stood, dropping it into the trash can. "I should go…."

"Zoe-"

"Later Doctor Stark," she interrupted and rushed out of his office leaving him stunned and confused. He wasn't sure what to make of her words. What could she possibly be implying? In the back of his mind he knew exactly what she was implying, but the very idea shook him to his core. He couldn't even imagine it. He couldn't comprehend it. For so long they'd fought each other. Carter had always seemed just as fond of him as he was of heights. They couldn't stand being around each other more than five minutes, and yet for three months they'd managed to live with each other. Had something happened between them? Was that why Allison seemed so uncomfortable with his affection?

Nathan looked down at the thumb drive on his desk for what seemed like the hundredth time, picking it up as he twirled it around in his hand. He'd resisted watching whatever was on the drive for fear that he wouldn't like what he learned, but he was starting to wonder if ignorance was the right option. With a sigh the scientist hooked up the thumb drive to his computer. He wasn't sure why his heart was beating so fast, but he continued to ignore it, his mouse paused over the box that would open the single file left in the thumb drive. He couldn't get the look Zoe'd sent him out of his mind, the serious look in her eyes that spoke volumes. He didn't know what to expect, but he had a feeling. The strange thing was the thing that surprised him the most, the thing that scared him the most was the sudden burst of anticipation when he stared at the file on the computer. It was now or never. With a final breath he double clicked and waited for the video to activate.

To Be Continued


	12. Chapter 12

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: Almost done! I'm thinking one or two chapters left! :faints:

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Twelve

Jack stared at the single picture, unable to pull his eyes away. He couldn't stop staring at the image, desperate for some type of connection to Nathan, the only proof he had that the last three months really had happened. Zoe had taken the picture. Jack smiled at the memory of Nathan's arms wrapped around him as he posed for the picture while Jack had rolled his eyes in annoyance. They'd been in the bunker at the time, and Zoe had just bought the camera for a photography class she'd wanted to take. Nathan's smile held his usual cocky disposition, but was mixed with something else, something Jack had never expected. He looked happy… genuinely happy. Although he longed for those moments he'd shared with Nathan during the last three months, he was finally beginning to understand why it'd been so important for him to use the 'Retriever.'

Although the last three months had been amazing if not a little bumpy, but the last few years had been something else entirely. All the banter, arguments, jokes, and flirting… that's what they'd shared for much longer than three months, and Jack wouldn't change those moments for the world. Stark could be a bastard at times, and he drove Carter absolutely mad sometimes, but that was a part of his charm. Nathan had been happy, but not complete. He'd needed that part of himself back, and Jack hadn't understood that. He did now. Nathan was a packaged deal, just as Jack was. It was what he loved about him. Stark was not a simple man, he was a challenge, and Carter enjoyed challenges. It was why he'd become a Marshall, why he'd accepted a job as Eureka's Sheriff, why he loved his job so much, why he'd become a father, and why he was in love with of all people… Doctor Nathan Stark.

"Carter?"

Jack hurriedly put away the photo as his Deputy entered the Sheriff's office. "Hey Jo," he greeted with a forced smile.

Jo frowned, seeing right through him. "You okay?"

Jack chuckled at the question. He'd heard it so many times over the last couple of days from almost everyone. "Do you really want me to answer that?" he asked.

Lupo sighed, handing him a Vinspresso. "Come on Chief, we have a job to do. Allison needs us at GD," she informed him.

Carter frowned, his mind switching gears immediately, a little relieved to have a distraction. "What for?"

"Apparently some important equipment's gone missing."

Jack nodded, grabbing his jacket. "Let's get to it then."

* * *

"I know you must be confused… hell, I'm you… of course you're confused. About three months ago I awoke with no memory of my life. Over these past few months I've only been able to retrieve bits and pieces of my memories… so I created a device, the 'Retriever.' If it worked you now have all of your memories returned to you. Unfortunately the affects of this device may likely wipe your short term memory, and leave you back where you started. I've decided to make this video to inform you of just what's happened since I returned from the dead… since you returned from the dead. What you choose to do with this information will be up to you… us, but you need to know all the facts, because I know you love Allison Blake… but I also know you love Jack Carter." Stark frowned, shocked to see himself say such words so easily. It was unreal. Love Carter? They barely tolerated each other! Perhaps they did occasionally flirt, but there was a difference between attraction and love.

"I know, insane," the video continued, and Stark watched himself smile. "We always did enjoy a challenge… at least from what I can remember. These last three months have been difficult. I can't even remember our Mother… only flashes… little glimpses of our childhood. It's hard not knowing who you are or where you come from. I had to be told my own name, or I might not have even known that much. Jack Carter… I can't even put into words how much he helped me keep sane when I was so frustrated I wanted to scream. He gave me something to hold onto, something to keep me going. The day I came back from the dead… I was lost. Just breathing again seemed to overwhelm me… then he came. Nathan, all he had to do is be there. You may be able to fool the rest of the world, but you can't fool yourself… you can't fool me. I see our past in my dreams. You love him… just as I do. I forgot my own name, but I never forgot that. That has to mean something. Either way, I know your sitting there… and you don't know what to think, but we can't just walk away. It's time for you to make a choice, to face what you've been running from since the moment you first met Sheriff Jack Carter. You can live in the past with Allison, or you can live for the future with Jack. It's your choice. So make it." Nathan watched himself for a moment before the video cut off. With a tired sigh he sat back in his chair, stunned.

* * *

Henry was just in the middle of signing a report when a thumb drive dropped onto the paper. "Have you seen this?"

Henry sighed, looking up to see Nathan Stark standing before him, hands in his pockets. "Good afternoon to you too, Nathan," he spoke, putting down his pen. He had a feeling this would take a minute.

"I asked you a question, Henry."

Henry frowned, picking up the thumb drive. He took a brief look at the drive then put it back down. "Nope, never seen it before in my life. What's all this about, Nathan?"

"I found this on my desk… it's a video for me… and from me," Stark explained, his voice filled with tension.

"Clever," said Henry, getting up from behind his desk. Stark turned and sat down, while Deacon took a seat next to him. He wasn't surprised Nathan had come up with a backup in case he were to forget the last few months. Henry understood how important Jack was to Stark.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Nathan asked, upset.

"It wasn't my place to tell you," Henry told him.

"It wasn't your place to tell me I was possibly in a relationship with the man I've spent _years_ fighting with… over another woman I might add? Henry, you should have told me! Allison can barely look me in the eye anymore!"

It hadn't been easy for Henry to keep his mouth closed about it. There were many times when he'd wanted to tell him the truth. He wanted to see Jack and Nathan happy just as much as anyone else. He'd seen them together right till the end and he knew first hand what they could be like together. It would be explosive and earth-shattering, but it would also be something worth treasuring for the rest of their lives. Every time they got close it seemed like the world found yet another obstacle to put in their way, and it was frustrating to watch. When Stark had told him that he had no memory of the last three months he'd wanted so badly to shout out the truth, that for three months he'd watched the scientist and the Sheriff slowly find love only for it all to be erased. Two steps forward and one giant step back. "Nathan, you two weren't in a relationship. You're both too stubborn for that. You see, you two are the type that enjoy walking around the situation until it slaps you in the face. You'd deny what's right in front of you for as long as you could until it finally got too big to ignore."

Nathan folded his arms, looking away. "It's not like I was trying to ignore anything, Henry. I… it could never work out. Besides, I enjoy fighting with him too much to be in a relationship with him," he told him with a small smile.

Henry smiled back. "Moments before you were to undergo the procedure I watched you two stand in that lab… saying your one last goodbye. I saw the look in your eyes, Nathan. You love him." He'd seen the look before, had been in Nathan's same position once when Kim was alive. He knew first hand how it felt to be in love with someone.

Stark's smile faded. "That's not possible."

Henry's smile grew as he pat his long time friend on the back. "Nathan, you came back from the dead. Nothing's impossible."

* * *

Nathan took another sip of his brandy, enjoying the burn as it slid down his throat. He'd spent the last hour at Café Diem just trying to figure out what the hell he was supposed to do. The very idea of being in a romantic relationship with Sheriff Jack Carter seemed laughable at best. It just didn't fit. His whole life he'd always known who and what he wanted. His father had taught him to never be content with second place. He'd spent his whole life pushing himself to be bigger and better than anyone. While most his age were busy playing soccer and basketball with their friends, he'd been busy writing out complicated formulas and studying his ass off. He was taught to strive for excellence, to reach for perfection and never settle for anything less. He'd had plans… plans of meeting the perfect person, the one he'd spend the rest of his life with. Allison had fit the bill perfectly. She was smart, strong, proud, and extremely beautiful. She fit perfectly in the picture he'd painted of how his life would turn out. Unfortunately he'd never planned how complicated married life could be. As much as he'd loved Ally, his work had always come first… something his wife hadn't been all that keen on accepting. So he'd tried to change. He'd even managed to get her to agree to marry him again.

Everything had finally been back on track. He was once again working at Global, his relationship with Allison had been going well, and everything else slowly seemed to be clicking into place. Falling in love with Jack Carter just simply wasn't part of the plan. He loved Allison… he had no doubts about that, but he couldn't quite ignore the pull Carter had on him. Since the moment he'd met the Sheriff he'd known nothing good would come of their interactions. It had started with jealousy. Jack Carter interfered with his plans of that successful life he'd always been so focused on achieving for himself. Then one day he'd watched the man he was supposed to hate shot in the chest, just barely alive. Carl Carlson had managed to save his life, though Nathan had been quick to focus on the artifact rather than the fact that he'd actually been scared he might lose the Sheriff. He'd tucked those feelings away before they could take root in his mind and completely ruin the plans he'd made for his life. Then Callister had returned to Eureka, and like always Jack Carter had refused to let it go. In the end he'd found himself opening up to the Sheriff, and actually letting the man into a part of himself he hadn't even revealed to Ally. He'd known then he was on slippery grounds. If he wasn't careful his attraction to Carter could quite easily become something dangerous. Unfortunately he'd had no idea how to stop himself, like a fly to a Dionaea muscipula.

It wasn't until Kevin had been exposed to the artifact that he'd found a way to distract himself from his growing feelings, effectively drawing him closer to his ex-wife. Kevin was like a son to him, and he'd been more than willing to sacrifice anything and everything to save the young boy. The problem was no matter what he did, the feelings never really did go away. Not even asking Allison to marry him had quieted the voice in the back of his mind telling him how wrong it all felt. He wasn't going to let anyone or anything interfere with his plans… or so he'd thought. Henry was right. Stark could never hate Jack Carter. If this was the universe's idea of a joke, someone seriously needed to point out just how cruel of a joke it really was. "Are you planning on spending the whole night wallowing in self pity, because at some point this place has to close so we can all go home," Zoe spoke, taking his empty plate.

Nathan looked up at the teenager so similar to her father. Zoe had a fire in her eyes that was a rare find, a passion not many could match. It was probably what Stark liked most about her… and why he'd fallen so hard for her father. The scientist took another sip of his drink. "I'm not wallowing… I'm… meditating on an issue that has recently come to my attention."

Zoe rolled her eyes. "With a bottle of brandy?"

Stark raised an eyebrow. "Exactly… how do you meditate?"

The younger Carter laughed, shaking her head as she took a seat opposite him. "Well, normally I leave the brandy alone… helps get the juices flowing when I'm not drunk out of my mind."

"I'm not drunk," he corrected before taking another long sip, finishing off the glass. He immediately poured himself more.

"Yet," she added.

Nathan frowned.

"Seriously, so you have feelings for my Dad… big deal! I mean what is it with you! Do we really have to go through this whole song and dance again?" she asked, her frustration with him evident as she folded her arms.

"Not the first time?"

Zoe shook her head. "Oh believe me, you didn't make it any easier on him the last time we went through this. For awhile there I was sure you were going to pick Allison. She is the easier choice."

Nathan couldn't really disagree with that. Allison was the easier choice. They had a past history. She made sense. "Can't argue with you there."

The teen glared at him, and for a second he was sure he was talking to her father. "Have you always been this much of a coward or is this a new development?"

It seemed she also possessed her father's sharp tongue. Zoe Carter obviously did not pull punches. Nathan could see why they'd been so close over the months he'd lost his memories. "You know I really don't see how this is any of your business what I do."

"It becomes my business when what you do affects my father! You weren't there, okay?! You didn't see how hard it was for him when he'd thought he'd lost you! You weren't there the night I watched my own father break down over a man half the town believed he hated! You don't remember how much my father sacrificed when you finally turned up… alive and with absolutely no memory! This isn't a game, Nathan!" she snapped, surprising the scientist. He hadn't realized how much the situation was affecting her until just then, and immediately regretted what he'd said.

Stark hesitated for a moment before finally laying a hand over hers. "I know… and I promise I will figure this out. This may be the second go round for you, but to me it doesn't feel that way. I need time to digest all this. Falling for your father wasn't really part of the plan."

Zoe let out a breath. "I know… I just… don't want to see him hurt again," she admitted. "I better finish cleaning up," she whispered with a faint smile and grabbed her tray to take to the back.

Nathan watched her go, her words running through his mind over and over again until he could feel the floodgates open and he finally allowed himself to close his eyes and envision what being with Carter would truly be like. He wondered what it would be like to feel Jack's lips against his, to hold him, make love to him. He thought about waking up beside the man each morning, about weekends filled with flirting and fighting, about all the laughter and all the heartache that would come with a relationship with a man like Jack Carter. For a brief moment he allowed himself to see both the good and the bad. A relationship with Jack would be passionate, adventurous, frustrating, ironic, and absolutely absurd… insane, unwise, reckless. A relationship with Jack was like coloring outside the lines. Nathan never colored outside the lines.

"Hey Sheriff," greeted Vincent, and Nathan's eyes immediately opened as he searched the room to see the man he couldn't stop thinking about walk into Café Diem. "Long day?"

"You have no idea…" he muttered with a sigh.

"How about a nice cup of decaf to go?" offered Vince with a sympathetic smile.

Carter smiled. "That would be great… mind getting Zoe while you're at it?"

"No problem," Vince said as he walked into the back.

Nathan waited, holding his breath as Jack waiting, sensing he was not alone as his eyes drifted to meet Stark's. "Deja vu," he spoke with a small smile. "You know, we really gotta stop meeting like this, scientist."

Stark finished off his glass. His eyes were drawn to Jack's deep blues, and for the first time he allowed himself to really look, searching for something though he couldn't be certain what. Jack was the one that finally looked away, flushed. Nathan stood, walking over to the Sheriff. He wasn't quite sure what to do, but he knew he couldn't run from the issue forever. Zoe was right… he was being a coward. "Oh believe me… running into you wasn't exactly part of the plan."

Jack faltered for a moment, and Nathan wondered if perhaps he'd said something similar before. "I suppose not." This time Jack held Nathan's gaze, and the scientist could feel the tension in the air. Suddenly his heart was beating a mile a minute, and he felt like he couldn't breathe… might never breathe again. He was surprised by the sudden urge that bubbled forth to kiss this man standing before him… to screw his plans and just give in. It would be so easy to just take another step forward and pull Jack to him. Would he be making a mistake? Was Jack worth the risk? Was this really what he wanted? Nathan took another step forward, and Carter's eyes darkened as he seemed to realize what was happening. They were lost in a moment. The closer he got, the clearer things became, and as he leaned forward just a bit his doubts faded. This was what he wanted. He wanted Jack Carter.

"Okay Sheriff, I've got your decaf!" said Vince unaware, and Nathan jumped, immediately moving a safe distance away, cursing the cook's timing.

Jack cleared his throat awkwardly. "Uh thanks, Vince. And Zoe?"

"Just getting her things," Vincent assured him with a pleasant smile.

Jack nodded, and the three men stood together in an uncomfortable silence as Vince slowly seemed to realize he'd interrupted something if the quick glance and widened eyes were any indication. "I'm ready," Zoe said a minute later as she pulled on her sweater and walked out from behind the counter.

"Right… thanks again, Vince! Uh… see ya later, Stark."

Nathan smiled sadly, seeing his opportunity slip away as he watched the Sheriff head out the door. "Right… see you around, Jack."

To Be Continued

A/N: Am I evil or what? :D


	13. Chapter 13

See You Around

By Andie O'Neill

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Angst

Pairing: Nathan/Carter, slight Nathan/Allison

Summary: They all thought he was gone, but when Nathan Stark appears in Eureka with no memory of who he is, it's Jack Carter that must learn the truth… and face the demons he never thought he had. Jack/Nathan Slash! SPOILERS FOR "I Do, Over."

A/N: So I decided to end it here with this very last chapter. Sorry it took so long, but it was hell trying to figure out how it should end, but I think I found something that worked. It's been awesome, and I thank all of you who stuck in there with me and gave me your encouragement. Couldn't have finished it without you guys! :D THANKS!

Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka, and that's probably a good thing….

* * *

Part Thirteen

"You think he'll make the right choice?" Allison asked quietly as she watched her son sleep on the couch in her office under a blanket. He looked so peaceful, so normal. She loved watching Kevin sleep.

Henry sat across from her in a chair in front of her desk, rolling a rubber band ball in his hands. "I wish I knew," was the only answer he gave, and Allison wondered if he was holding back because of her feelings for Nathan. It was true, she did love Nathan, but she'd long ago accepted that they weren't meant to be. Slowly her hand moved to the necklace her ex-husband had given her. "I do know one thing… he'd be a fool to let Jack slip through his fingers. When I think about all the missed opportunities when Kim and I first met…" his voice broke off.

Allison pulled her gaze from her son and smiled sadly at Henry. "You got a second chance with her, Henry… that's all that matters. You two were happy, and you were together. You'll always have that."

Henry nodded, looking away. Allison knew how hard it was for him. When Kevin's father had died she'd never felt so lost. She'd been left with a child to raise, alone, and it hadn't been easy. It never was easy to lose someone, but she'd managed to survive, just as Henry would. Allison followed Henry's eyes, watching her son shift in his sleep.

Deciding it would be better to change the subject she focused on her son, and the news Henry had recently given her regarding how Nathan Stark had managed to cheat death. "You really think it was Kevin? That saved Nathan?"

"It's the only theory that works. It explains everything… the scans after Nathan's sudden appearance that matched readings taken from the artifact and Kevin… there right there is reason enough. We can't possibly imagine what the artifact is capable of. What I do know is Kevin knew what was going to happen. He knew Nathan was going to die."

"It doesn't make any sense; if he somehow managed to transfer some of the artifact's energy to Nathan wouldn't he have shown some sign? The last time he was exposed to that kind of energy he almost burst into flames," she pointed out.

"Kevin controlled the field, Allison. We have no idea what is and is not possible with that kind of power at your fingertips. That energy had to go somewhere. I just hope Nathan realizes just what a precious gift he was given," Henry told her, gently settling the rubber band ball back on her desk.

Allison turned to look at Henry and smiled. "I hope so too." Henry turned, looking into her eyes and Allison was relieved to see the amusement hidden behind the chocolate brown depths.

"And if he doesn't we can always find ways of reminding him," he told her.

Allison laughed. "Oh I'm sure Jack will be more than happy to take that job."

Deacon chuckled, shaking his head. "Come on, it's getting pretty late. I'll walk you to your car."

She'd planned on staying a little longer to catch up on some paper work, especially with Thorne breathing down her neck about the stolen items Carter was now investigating, but as she felt herself yawn she knew it would have to wait for tomorrow. "Thanks, that'd be great."

* * *

Nathan stared at the ceiling as he lay in bed in the dark. Time was ticking by and he'd given up on sleep. He couldn't stop thinking about Jack. He wanted Jack Carter. He never thought it could happen. He'd loved Allison for so long… and now there was someone else. He would always care for Allison, but when he looked into Jack's eyes the feelings that overwhelmed him in those short moments were indescribable. He'd never felt such power, like this force… a hold that put gravity to shame. When he closed his eyes he saw blue pools looking back and his heart beat faster, his skin tingles; a shiver runs down his back. He sees those eyes and he can't breathe. He craves more… his hands itch to touch Jack's face, his body, everything. His lips feel dry as they yearn to feel Jack's lips pressed against his own.

Nathan wasn't used to such things. It was intense, yet oddly thrilling. He wanted more. He watched Jack walk away, the moment gone just as quickly as it had come, but the aftershocks were wreaking havoc in his mind. His life had become one giant contradiction where rules that normally cancelled each other out thrived together. He was a scientist. He believed in mathematics, equations, physics… just as a musician believed in notes and sounds… an artist in shades and lines… a writer in words and ideas. He was a scientist. One plus one always equaled two. E equals MC squared. He lived by laws… laws of physics, laws of gravity. Loving Jack meant breaking laws. It meant one plus one didn't always equal two. It was a whole new world and Nathan didn't know how to deal with it. He didn't understand this world.

Nathan closed his eyes, rubbing his face in frustration as he realized he could wait any longer. It didn't matter what world he was now living in. What mattered was what he was that he was LIVING in it… he was ALIVE. He'd never felt so alive in all his life. It was ironic really… it'd taken his death to realize just what it meant to be alive. For once in his life he wanted to break the rules… the rules he'd stuck by since before he could remember. His original plans for his future… his father's original plans. None of it mattered. It meant nothing to him anymore. He wanted Sheriff Jack Carter, and he wanted him now. Everything else was meaningless. He'd been given a second change, and he wasn't about to go fuck it up.

* * *

"**Doctor Stark is at the door, Sheriff**," said S.A.R.A.H. with her usual calm demeanor.

Jack groaned, peeking an eye open, not quite ready to get out of bed. "You have got to be kidding me," he grumbled, rolling over onto his back. "What time is it?"

"**One o'clock AM**," answered S.A.R.A.H.

Jack swore under his breath, forcing himself to sit up as he rubbed his tired eyes. "The man's lose his mind… what the hell could he possibly want?" he mumbled under his breath to no one in particular. The Sheriff slowly got himself out of bed, pulling on a shirt. He thought about pulling on some pants as he was in his boxers, but was too tired to find a pair. "Let him in S.A.R.A.H."

"**As you wish, Sheriff**."

Jack rolled his eyes at her cheerfulness, leaving his room. He walked down the steps just as the door opened and Nathan Stark entered. The Sheriff paused once he'd stepped off the last step, staring curiously at the scientist now in his living room. Nathan was in some worn out jeans and a rather tight red shirt that highlighted all his best attributes. It was a different look, but suited the man well. "Hey… so exactly what have you blown up this time?"

Stark's eyebrows lowered in confusion. "Excuse me?"

"I assume you're here because of some GD emergency considering the fact that it's one o'clock in the morning. Either that or you're exploring a new form of torture. If that is the case you should know a tired Sheriff is a dangerous Sheriff," he warned warily, folding his arms.

Nathan smiled in amusement. "You know… I blame you."

This time it was Jack's turn to be completely confused by the change in subject. "You blame me?" he repeated, not quite sure where the other man was going. "Wanna tell me what I did?"

Nathan took a step forward, his green eyes fierce in a way Carter never remembered seeing them, pupils blown wide, and sudden Jack had a feeling his visit had nothing to do with business. "I blame you for why I'm not with Allison… why I can't be with Allison." Jack felt his heart sink upon hearing the words. He was never going to let her go… he should have expected as much. Nathan continued on, taking another step. "You ruined everything. I had it all planned out… then you came in and blew it all to hell." Carter wasn't sure what to say. Earlier Jack had been sure back at Café Diem that they would have kissed if not for Vincent, but now the man looked almost angry as he spoke of his ruined plans. Nathan had talked about his plans once before… then again, falling in love with an emotionally stunted, genius scientist hadn't exactly been Carter's big plan either. Jack forced himself not to move, not to back down as he stared into the other man's dark green eyes. "I was supposed to hate you," Nathan whispered.

Jack couldn't help it as the corners of his mouth lifted into a small smile, relaxing immediately. "I was supposed to hate you too."

They were close, too close. Nathan's hand rose, hesitating for a second before he caressed the side of Jack's face. Carter stood perfectly still as the hand moved to the back of his neck, watched Nathan lower his lips till they were so close their breaths intermingled. "Just FYI… I don't," Nathan admitted softly. "I never did." Suddenly he moved forward, crushing their lips together. Jack immediately moaned as the kiss deepened, melting into it and he could have sworn he saw stars. Nathan's arms wrapped around him and Jack did the same, eager for more. God, he'd missed this. When the kiss finally ended, Nathan was laughing.

"What is it?" Jack asked, curious.

Stark just shook his head. "I was just thinking… it feels pretty good to color outside the lines." Before Jack could even try to tackle what Nathan could possibly mean he was pulled into another bruising kiss. Jack really didn't mind the distraction.

* * *

Jack stared at Nathan's sleeping form, afraid he'd wake up to find it had all been a dream. He'd awake to find that Nathan Stark was still dead, or had chosen to go back to Allison rather take a chance on him. It didn't seem possible that it could finally be over. Had it really been five months since it all began? Over five months ago Nathan Stark had died, and the emotional rollercoaster ride since had only made things harder. It hit him all at once. He saw flashes of nights in bed… his grief overwhelming him, struggling every day just to get out of bed in the morning, the day Nathan Stark had reappeared and Jack had found himself in a clearing just holding the other man in his arms, long days of trying to help Nathan remember his past, the thrill of realizing he was in love, the pain that followed whenever something got in the way, the first night they'd finally made love, and the morning after when he'd felt his heart break. It had all been worth it, though. Jack was back in Nathan's arms and had no intentions of letting go… not this time.

Jack knew they weren't exactly a match made in heaven, but he couldn't help but feel it was meant to be. It hadn't been easy, and he never want to go through that kind of hell ever again, but it couldn't have all been for nothing. It had to mean something that he felt happier in this moment lying in Nathan's arms than he'd felt in a very, very long time… if ever. The scientist shifted in his sleep, tightening his hold on Jack and he almost laughed. He hadn't felt like laughing in a very long time.

* * *

Zoe frowned, staring at the red shirt lying haphazardly on the steps. She couldn't quite believe it to be her father's as she'd never seen it before, and it seemed a little strange that he'd just throw it on the steps considering what a neat freak he could often be. Zoe sighed, putting the mystery shirt on the couch as she headed toward the kitchen for breakfast, yawning. She paused the moment she heard voices coming from the kitchen, and neither sounded like Auntie Lex who she knew for a fact was still fast asleep.

"… don't you think it's a little early to be talking about marriage? I only just realized how I felt about you last night," said someone who sounded suspiciously like Nathan Stark. Zoe's heart sped up with hope, her eyes widening in surprise.

"All I'm saying is if we ever do decide to get married… we should shut down all GD projects first… just to be safe," said her father, and Zoe couldn't help but smile. It actually wasn't that bad an idea.

"I'll keep that in mind… although I'm pretty sure GD is done messing with time considering everything that's happened."

"Are you kidding me?! If it's not the time space continuum it something else… hell, next they'll probably be opening windows to other universes or playing with the laws of physics. Believe me, it's Global Dynamics… they'll find something else to screw up… inevitably causing the end of the world as we know it!" her father ranted.

"Don't you think you're being a little mellow dramatic, Jack?" asked Nathan.

Her father paused for a moment, and Zoe risked peaking into the kitchen, catching her father's pointed look. "Should we got ask Thorne to fetch the graph with the little red dots?"

Stark smiled, clearing his throat. "I don't think that'll be necessary," the scientist told him, smiling as he kissed her father's lips gently, and Zoe's smile widened. She would have screamed if it weren't for the fact that she'd just been eavesdropping. Zoe took a moment to calm herself down before finally making her presence known, pausing at the door as she pretended to be stunned by the scene before her.

"Oh. My. God!"

Nathan immediately moved away, breaking his kiss with her father. "Zoe!" her father and Stark both shouted in unison.

Zoe couldn't restrain herself from jumping towards Nathan, giving him a crushing hug as she thanked whatever deity responsible. "Took you long enough! You know for a scientist you certainly aren't the brightest crayon in the box!" she shouted when she'd finally pulled away.

Nathan smiled down at her. "Uh… thanks?"

"Zoe!" shouted Jack, giving her a glare.

Zoe ignored her father, staring at the scientist for a long moment. When her father and her mother had first gotten a divorce Zoe never would have believed she'd deal with her family being split apart. Then one day she'd learned to accept it… her only hope being that her father wouldn't be alone for the rest of his life. She wanted to see him happy again. The night she'd witnessed her father break down she'd wondered if she'd ever see her wish come true, and over the last few months she'd been quite certain it never would… until now. Zoe hugged Nathan once more, her smile growing as she felt his hands move gently around her… and that was the exactly moment that Zoe Carter began to cry. But not because she was upset… these tears were tears of joy… because it was finally, FINALLY over.

* * *

_**Seven Months Later**_

"_See you around, Jack."_

_Jack couldn't help but stare into Nathan's eyes as the countdown continued. He didn't understand. He knew something bad was about to happen. Stark knew it too if the sad look in his eyes meant anything at all. He couldn't look away no matter how hard he wanted to. All he could do was hold Nathan's gaze, see the tears Stark refused to let fall and suddenly it hit him like a ton of bricks. His heart wouldn't stop pounding… so loud it was all he could hear anymore. He felt cold, as if the world was both ending and beginning at the same time and he was powerless to stop it. Time stood still as the countdown ended… and all Jack could see was Nathan Stark. NO! It was over, and his body went numb. Time sped up moments later, but while Fargo shouted in triumph Carter watched the man he loved disappear, taking a piece of Jack's soul with him._

"**JACK!**"

Jack thrashed and jerked trying to reach out to Nathan, but all he felt was air.

"**JACK!**"

Jack's eyes opened immediately, gasping for air, his muscles tense, sweat pouring down his face and for a moment he panicked in the dark. "NATHAN!"

Warm hands pulled him close, and Jack sighed in relief as he was held in a strong embrace, desperate. He could barely breathe, his heart still beating far too quick, and he was starting to feel a little light-headed. "Shhhh its okay… I'm here… its okay." The words soothed him immediate, and he closed his eyes tight, chasing away the horrifying images from his memory. He rarely got the nightmares anymore, but when they came… they hit him just as hard as they always had.

"Oh god… you were dead… you died," he whispered, still panting.

"I know, Jack… its okay. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere," Nathan told him, rocking him back and forth, doing anything and everything to calm Jack down.

He was practically shaking, but it helped to hear Nathan's voice, to feel his firm grip reminding him that everything was okay. A year ago Nathan had died, and although he'd come back… the scars left behind would probably never go away. He refused to let the tears swelling in his eyes fall, forcing himself to calm down and slowly he began to relax. Jack's head was buried in Nathan's chest and he lifted his head up, pulling Nathan down for a soft kiss. "God, I love you so much… don't you ever leave me again." He said the words every time the nightmare came.

Nathan kissed him back. "I'll do my best," he whispered just as he had every other time. "I love you too, Jack."

They lay in bed holding each other for hours, both knowing sleep would not come for some time. They'd both had close calls in the past, but nothing touched what had happened to Nathan. That moment in time… the day Nathan Stark died had changed Jack's world in more ways than he ever would have imagined. Jack wasn't sure what he would have done if Nathan hadn't come back… but he had come back. He was alive, he was breathing, and he was with Jack. "You never even said goodbye."

"What?"

"That day…" Jack swallowed hard. "You never said goodbye. Why?"

Nathan sighed, tightening his hold on Jack even more. "I can't explain how I know… but I knew it wasn't goodbye. It couldn't end that way… not for us. I wasn't going to die in some tube saving the world… my life full of regrets."

Jack almost smiled at the idea of Nathan refusing to believe he could die in such a way, as if the very idea was unthinkable. It seemed almost sick to ask, but he couldn't let it go. "Then exactly how do you go?"

Nathan kissed his lips. "In your arms… old and grey," he whispered.

The dream faded from his mind, as Jack slowly closed his eyes. "After having lived happily ever after?" he teased, feeling himself drift back to sleep.

Nathan chuckled beside him. "Go back to sleep… I promise I'll be here when you wake up."

"Okay… see you around, Nathan," said Jack, just before he surrendered, falling back to sleep.

Nathan leaned down, kissing Jack's lips. "See you around, Jack."

Those words, at one time bringing nothing but despair, became something else entirely. It was strange how such simple words could have such a powerful affect. Those words were not a final goodbye, as Jack had once thought, but beacon of hope… because they would see each other again. They _had_ seen each other again. After all, this wasn't just some ordinary town with its ordinary people living their ordinary lives… this was Eureka. And nothing was impossible in Eureka… not even coming back from the dead….

The End


End file.
